Dr. Cullen's Love Shack

::Team Twilight:: Fan Fiction Friday

2012-02-10T21:31:00.000-05:00

“I hope you've got enough sleep these last 18 years 'cause you won't be getting anymore for a while.” If you’re even half as excited, I know you won’t be getting any sleep either. But just in case you’ll actually be waiting a few days to see the movie Lab Tech Andi has picked out a few Valentine’s for you to enjoy while you wait. So skip or bounce, if you must, to the blue door at the back of the shack, knock the energetic beat of “I’m so excited” by The Pointer Sisters and the password is “It’s Time”. Be Safe!

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

“It’s here!! It’s FINALLY HERE!!”

“What’s here?”

“The DVD RELEASE DAY!! IT’S FINALLY HERE!!!” I was literally bouncing off the walls with excitement. Emmett just laughed at me.

“Wow Alice, She’s like a human version of you, only taller.” Emmett laughed while Alice glared back at him.

“There’s no way I’m that bad! What did she do? Eat an entire bag of coffee beans?” Alice shook her head.

“I thought she was going to help us plan something for Valentine’s Day, but Andi looks like she needs a sedative.”

Alice moved to stand in front of me and grabbed my arms to stop me from jumping, “Stop it, you’re making me tired and I don’t get tired.”

“But it’s here, Alice!!” I yelled at her.

“Technically, it’s not until tomorrow, so you need to calm yourself down woman! There’s a post to put out!” Alice tried to reason with me. It really wasn’t any use though.

“Semantics, Alice! Soon, I’ll have my DVD and I’ll be watching that for 2 days straight, so stop being Debbie Downer, I’m too excited!!!” I started bouncing again the second she let go and again she shook her head at me.

“Well, do you have any stories to recommend this week? I mean it is Friday.”

“Yes, Alice. I have stooooorrrrriiieeeeessssss!” I sang to her.

Emmett laughed again and then asked, “And are you going to help me with my Valentine plans for Rose?”

I jumped over in his direction, “Yep!” Then tapped his nose with my finger; he laughed again.

“It’s like she’s high.” He said to Alice ignoring me.

“I think she’ll get it all done if we just leave her alone. Let’s go,” Alice said turning toward the door.

“But what if she does something funny?” Emmett asked following Alice.

“She won’t, trust me.” Then they shut the door behind them and left me to my jumping.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Ok, I realize that it’s the weekend before Valentine’s Day and with the DVD release of Breaking Dawn coming out, you’re time will be limited, so all my deals this week are light and short, but not all are lemon free. Enjoy!!

My first little valentine is a spicy little tale called “Boycotting Valentine's Day” by jennlynnfs. As Valentine's Day approaches, Bella’s choosing to hang out with her best friend Alice instead of trying to settle on any of the morons that cross her path on a day to day basis. Together they decide to boycott Valentine's Day and Non-Valentine's Day activities are planned, including no boys. But what if Alice's brothers, Edward and Emmett, come along. They don’t count, right?
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5681116

My next little valentine is a fluffy oneshot tale called “Be Mine, Miss Valentine?” by Raptured Ignorance. In this all human tale, Valentine’s Day at Forks High School isn't usually this fun and Bella isn’t one for the romantic stuff. But roses mean everything, and a special note leaves Miss Bella Swan breathless. This is such a cute fic and parts of it will make you wonder if it’s really AU.
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/4804962

My third little valentine is a jaded tale called “Love and Other Lies” by BookWorm4Life17. Bella’s a cynical writer who’s attempting to pen a novel on what "really" happens when people fall in love, but considering she’s never really been in love, spends her time people watching at her favorite café. Edward, her best friend's British cousin and a romantic, is amused at her negative view of love. He befriends the young writer in attempt to change her mind. Will his efforts pay off?
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/6121340

My final little valentine comes in the form of this short story titled “My Personal Valentine” by ronOReds. Forks High is running a special Personal Ad column in their newspaper right before Valentine’s Day. Will advertising for a date help Bella, Alice, and Rosalie find their special someone in time for Valentine’s Day!
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/3922925

To go along with all these lovey dovey tales, I’d recommend a “Toasted Marshmallow Amore”

Ingredients
3/4 oz Kahula
3/4 oz Ameretto
3/4 oz Bailey's
1-1/4 oz Toasted Marshmallow Syrup
2 oz Ice Cream

Mixing directions
Shaken with ice and poured into a martini glass.

Until next time, Tweet (FanFicDealer), Message me on Facebook, or email (fanficdealer@gmail.com) if you want to talk shop.

The deal has been made. ;)

::Team Twilight:: Fan Fiction Friday

2012-02-03T21:38:00.000-05:00

Been experiencing any déjà vu lately? Feeling like you’re in a runt? Never fear, Lab Tech Andi’s been researching fresh deals to brush off the blah blah of the everyday routine. So, skip down the path to the blue door at the back of the shack, knock the upbeat tune of the “Pennsylvania Polka” and the password is “New Day”. Be Safe!!

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

“Okay, campers, rise and shine, and don't forget your booties 'cause it's cooooold out there today.”
“It's coooold out there every day. What is this, Miami Beach?”
“Not hardly. And you know, you can expect hazardous travel later today with that, you know, that, uh, that blizzard thing.”
“That blizzard - thing. That blizzard - thing. Oh, well, here's the report! The National Weather Service is calling for a "big blizzard thing!"
“Yessss, they are. But you know, there's another reason why today is especially exciting.”
“Especially cold!”
“Especially cold, okay, but the big question on everybody's lips... “
“On their chapped lips...”
“On their chapped lips, right: Do ya think Phil is gonna come out and see his shadow?”
“Punxsutawney Phil!”
“That's right, woodchuck-chuckers - it's...”
“GROUNDHOG DAY!”

Ok, it was funny the first time. It was even funny the second and third time, but when Emmett restarted that moronic movie for the 18th time I’d had it.

“Emmett! It’s not even Groundhog’s Day anymore!!! Can’t you watch something else?” I begged.

“But Rose won’t let me watch it over there!”

“I’m beginning to agree with her.”

This whole thing started yesterday morning when Emmett burst into the lab yelling “GROUNDHOG DAY” waving a disc in the air. I recognized the movie right away and since I’d always thought it was funny, I agreed to let him play it. Of course that was before I realized he was going to torture with it.

The first time through, I couldn’t even concentrate are Emmett and I laughed ourselves sick.

The second time, he recited all the lines along with the movie.

The sixth time, Jasper came over and they actually played out the scene where Phil runs into Ned on the sidewalk every time it played on the screen. Alright, I must admit that was actually sort of funny.

After the eighth time, I was getting tired and Emmett started throwing snowballs at me when the characters started to do that in the movie. And I started to yell at him, at which point Alice actually saved me for a few hours to get some sleep. Then he woke me up this morning by playing it again and the first few times through I was able to tune it out, but now I was starting to lose my mind.

“Please Emmett! I just can’t take it! I’m losing my mind!” I began to bang my head on the table.

“Fine,” he sighed as he started to dig around in a cabinet. “Hey, here’s a copy of Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy, wanna watch that?” He came over and waved the movie in front of my face.

“Just so I don’t have to hear about a weather predicting rodent.”
So he headed over to the player and slipped the disc in. Ah, finally something new.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

How a vampire with perfect recall can find enjoyment out of watching a movie that many times is beyond me, but since I had my own repeating event, all my deals this week have a repeating theme, but I’ll spare you the same torture.

Funny how the past tends to repeat itself, like it does in this little tale called “The New Kids” by A.Ash. It’s been 7 years since Renesmee’s birth and the Cullen family has decided it’s time to relocate and start high school again. For Nessie, this will be the first time she’ll be surrounded by a normal human existence, which is making the rest of the family nervous, but she couldn’t be more excited. However, she’s been keeping Jacob at a distance only acknowledging his friendship and overlooking his desire for more. Will she learn to love Jacob the way he wants her to? Or will she meet someone at school and repeat the history that brought her Mom and Dad together? This is a very innocent story and the humor in it will have you rolling. It’s so very cute to see Nessie grow up.
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/4789700

Sometimes, doing the same thing over and over again only gives you the same thing, unless you’re willing to make a few changes like the characters in this story called “The Appointment” by BadJuJuBoo. Bella and Edward have the perfect life, a beautiful home, a successful career, every need fulfilled. Or is it? Things are not always what they appear to be because they hide what’s really wrong. Bella hides behind her personal indiscretions, while Edward hides behind his work, but when the pieces start to fall away, Edward decides therapy is the way to go. As I said before, things are not always what they appear to be… Be warned, this story is hot and the lemons are graphic, but they have purpose, which is rare for a tale requiring so many cold showers.
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/4954416

It’s the little things in life like in this tale titled “The Butterfly Effect” by LyricalKris. Edward's fall from grace destroyed not only his life, but the lives of those he loved the most. When he passes out teetering on the edge of total destruction and wakes up 17 again, how many times will he have to repeat the same day to set things right? My favorite thing about this story was Edward’s realization of his geekiness. Aren’t all teenage boys kinda geeky and clueless? Maybe going back with the memory of his future will help out this time, of course maybe not.
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/6977924

To go along with all these repeating fics, I think we should have a drink that repeats too, so I’m recommending a 7 & 7.
Ingredients
2 oz. Whiskey, straight grain
5 oz. 7-up
1 wedge Lemon

Mixing Instructions
A classic whiskey recipe. Use a highball glass, and fill it with cubed ice. Add the whiskey and 7-up, stir slightly, and garnish with a lemon wedge.

Until next time, Tweet (FanFicDealer), Message me on Facebook, or email (fanficdealer@gmail.com) if you want to talk shop.

The deal has been made. ;)

::Team Twilight:: Fan Fiction Friday

2012-01-27T18:33:00.000-05:00

“Out on your own, Cold and alone again. Can this be what you really wanted, baby?” If you just don’t want to be alone tonight, Lab Tech Andi will always be here for you! Just grab something comfy and head to the blue door at the back of the shack, knock the rhythm of “Lacrymosa” by Evanescence and the password is “Amadeus”. Be Safe!

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

I hit play on my iPod and the room immediately filled with the sound of violins. I curled up on one end of couch, letting the music drowned out all the other sounds in the lab and continued reading my story. The combination of the music and the story I was reading made me completely oblivious to anything going on around me. So you can imagine my shock when my music was suddenly cut off.

“HEY! I was listening to that!” I turned in the direction of my stereo and saw Edward holding my iPod and scrolling through my music files.

“No you weren’t, no one really listens to that crap! Mozart was an imbecile, and I refuse to let anyone be fooled his odd fame!” he explained and then mumbled. “There must be some Bach or Chopin on here! Don’t these humans know anything about GOOD classical music?”

Knowing that I didn’t have to actually speak, I got up and glared as I walked toward him. For your information, I happen to like Mozart. Put it back! As I raised my hand to take it from him he flashed to the other side of the room, still scrolling through my files.

“EDWARD! This is my lab! It happens to be Mozart’s Birthday today and I’m listening to my music! NOW PUT IT BACK!!!” I yelled knowing there was no way I’d be able to catch him if he decided to run all over the lab. He glared at me from across the room and that’s when Alice’s tinkling laugh floated through the opening door.

“I’m so glad I didn’t get here earlier,” she skipped over to Edward plucking the device from his fingers and danced over handing it back to me. “That was way too funny! Come on, Edward. Let’s leave the humans to their music.”

“But it’s horrid and I can hear it for miles!” he exclaimed following after her.

“Hm,” she paused briefly, appearing to be looking for something. “Jazzy’s getting out his guitar, want to play something worthwhile?”

“Oh, anything to be away from here before she turns that noise back on.” And they sped off into the forest.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

As quickly as I could, I plunked it back in the dock, turning it all the way up. That will teach him, I thought and giggled to myself. That brought me to all my dealings for today, whether Edward likes the songs or not, they all have a little music in them, which I hope you’ll enjoy.

In this classically canon story titled “Music Lessons” by locqua, Edward and Bella explore the many magical qualities of music and the ways that it can be quite an aphrodisiac, even for vampires. When Edward shares his passion for classical music with Bella, they discover a whole new world together just weeks before their nuptials. The first half of this tale is a multiple chapter missing moment tale with the remaining chapters just fun and sexy one-shots. I always forget how much I really miss the playfulness that existed in the books between Bella and Edward until I find an author that gets it and reminds me that their book personas are so much less angsty. You’ll love reading through this just as much as I did.
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/4604826

Here is an adorably innocent tale called “For You I Will” by Xo-SARCASTIC-oX. For several years, Edward Cullen has been helping his mother teach music to young kids in their family garage, but if he has to struggle with one more reluctant 8 year-old he’s going to lose his mind. In an attempt to find music students more his age, Edward decides to put up a few flyers around school, but he’s been nearly invisible walking the halls, so his expectations are pretty low. Imagine his surprise when the girl of his dreams, the ‘IT’ girls notices his flyer and takes down his number. This is a quick read and it’s very cute. I love geeky Edward stories.
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/3973773

You’ll not want to miss a single note of this beautiful and heartbreakingly sweet tale titled “Music of the Heart” by wmr1601. From a very early age, music has been Bella’s sanctuary and the only thing that has brought love into her life in return. However, when she finally draws up the courage to escape her crumbling marriage, she’ll be forced to leave all her music and those she loves behind. But when she hears the music again, is it really fate showing her the way? Has her past really let her go to let her be happy? My favorite thing about this story is that the Charlie is a complete opposite; he owns a restaurant and knows how to cook!! You’ll love it!
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/7041186

And finally, a little Mozart inspired tale called, “A Little Night Music” by katinki. Bella, once broken and scared, finds her only comfort in a rented sound studio playing the piano late into the night. Across the hall a kindred spirit plays along and calls out to its mate. Will these two be able to handle the attraction that pulls them towards one another? Will they burn up in the flames of their pasts?
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5399688

Being that it’s Mozart’s birthday and I just like to annoy Edward, I think everyone should have a glass of “Mozart”

Ingredients
1 1/2 oz. Rum, anejo
1 tsp. Triple Sec
1/2 oz. Vermouth, sweet
2 dashes Bitters, orange
1 twist Lemon

Mixing Instructions
Shake everything with ice; strain into cocktail glass. Garnish with a lemon twist.

Until next time, Tweet (FanFicDealer), Message me on Facebook, or email (fanficdealer@gmail.com) if you want to talk shop.

The deal has been made. ;)

::Team Twilight:: Fan Fiction Friday

2012-01-20T17:46:00.000-05:00

"Cross over children. All are welcome. All welcome. Go into the Light. There is peace and serenity in the Light." Curious much? This week Andi has her geek glasses on and is ready to hold class. So grab your book bag and head to the blue door at the back of the shack, knock the sultry tune "Teach Me Tonight" as sung by the late Etta James and the password is "Here". Be Safe!

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

"So, I don't understand... What do lemons have to do with fan fiction?" Emmett stared at me from across the room with a confused look on his face. He looked so funny; I just couldn't help not to laugh.

After placing my lunch plate in the sink, I walked toward him, "It's just a term used to say that the story contains sexual content." I looked down at the screen he was looking at, "What are you reading?"

"But why lemons? Why not strawberries or chocolate or," and thought suddenly flashed across his face, giving him the biggest grin. He stood, crossing paths with a rare beam of sunlight which bounced off his face and shattered into a million little reflections all over the lab. "Sparkles!" he exclaimed. And I laughed again.

"It's because sparkling vampires didn't exist in 1984 when a sexually explicit amine story called 'Cream Lemon' was written." I tilted the tablet in my direction so I could see the screen better and then let it go. "Over the years it's been shortened to lemons and describes most sexual content."

Defensively, he followed after me, "I'm over 90 years old and I remember 1984 quite clearly!"

"But no one knew you existed, although I'm certain, if they had, sexual content would definitely have been called sparkles." I laughed again at the thought.

"You know, I'd wager a bet that there are quite a few of our fans who are unfamiliar with these crazy fan fiction terms."

Emmett leaned over my desk, "How much?"

"How much what?" now it was my turn to look confused.

"How much would you bet that the shack fans are unfamiliar with the fan fiction terms?" The gleam in his eye was getting a little scary.

Oh, I really need to watch how I say things around him. "I'm not betting you, Emmett! And I'm sure that a lot of them know, most are self-explanatory, but I think it would be good to define the ones we all run into the most often."

"Awww, come on! Not even a dollar?" Emmett begged.

"No! Now if you're not going to help, please find something else to do."

"Fine, I'll help." and with that he pulled out one of the laptops and began to type faster than I could.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

So, I could define over 1,000 terms used for fan fiction, but instead all the fics I'm dealing today will be an example of the term I'm defining. Here goes...

The term "Alternate Universe" (AU) is one of the most common I've seen in describing fan fics, especially Twilight fan fiction. These are stories that contain plots, settings, or character attributes that are radically different from the original story. Of course, to be very honest, I can't say I read a ton of fan fiction from other fandoms, but in the Twilight universe, the characters have been written into a broad spectrum of situations, one of the most common being All-Human (AH).

One all human tale that has to be one of my very favorites is called “Living Backwards” by ciaobella27. Bella is coerced into signing up for a Facebook account by Alice. She wasn’t very social in high school and didn’t become friends with Alice and Rosalie until they met at NYU despite the fact that they all went to high school together. So to be suddenly thrown into the world of social networking, with people she didn’t even know back then is pure torture, until Edward Cullen accepts her friend request. He was barely a blip on her radar in high school, but seeing his profile picture has given her a slight case of cyberstalker disease and now she’s curious about all the “What if’s”. Wouldn’t you be?
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5074723
http://www.twilighted.net/viewstory.php?sid=5185

Next up on the board is the term "Canon" which can refer to any elements that have been established by the original story. In the Twilight universe, this commonly describes character pairing, but can also indicate that this tale is an extension of the saga or a missing moment.

This is a single chapter (one-shot) canon piece that makes me giggle every time I read it called “Once Bitten” by NoMoreThanUsual. It’s a conversation where Bella and Edward imagine how things would have been different on their first day in Biology if Bella were the vampire and Edward the human. After the conversation I had with Emmett, do you think that this really happened or is it only fiction. Read it and let me know.
http://www.twilighted.net/viewstory.php?sid=1293

I think most of you understand this fan fic term, but I just couldn't pass up the opportunity to pimp something a little darker than usual. "Dark" fics refer to stories in which either the content or the characters themselves are written "darker" than their canon counterparts, although not necessarily outside the bounds of canon characterization. Can range from morally ambiguous to outright evil, possibly even psychopathic/sociopathic.

An excellent example of this a fic called "Lions Eat Lambs" by Raggdoll of Twilight. Bella and her friends think they are up for a few days of fun camping in the wonderful wilderness, but find they are completely unprepared for what really lurks in the forest. Bella wakes on her second day to find that all her friends are gone. Figuring they are only playing a joke, she sets out to find them, stumbling upon the manor of Edward Cullen. Little does she realize exactly what she's walking into when she steps into his house, and into a very dangerous game to ultimately rid him of his boredom. Not all monsters are make-believe and this story will keep you wide awake.
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5753638
http://www.twilighted.net/viewstory.php?sid=11052

Now this next term is slightly flexible, but traditionally "Drabble" refers to stories of exactly 100 words in length. However, it's also widely used to describe fun, fluffy stories that are less than a 1,000 words in length.

One of the best examples of drabble I've seen lately is titled, "Family Holiday" by Signature.Hot.Chocolate. This laugh-out-loud bit of fluff will have you rolling as you learn about Bella's concerns about her daughter joining in on a Halloween tradition.
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/4602092/1/

Next is a term I'm sure none of you are a stranger to "Smut" or "Porn" which generally describes stories or scenes of graphic sex, in which any plot or character development that also occurs is incidental to the sex itself. This term is used differently from "lemons" in that a tale can be "lemony", but be about more than just the sex.

If, I'm looking for smut this tale called "Exchange" by BoydBlog brings it full on. Bella has a Third Date Rule. Would it delude her into continuing with the not so perfect date? Sometimes fate intervenes to correct an imbalance. Not even the location can deter frenzied would-be soul mates.
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5907967

And lastly, we have "Lemon" which, as I explained to Emmett earlier, simply refers to the presence of graphic or explicit sexual content. This can be either heterosexual or homosexual in nature and originated in the anime fandoms.

A very lemony tale I've found recently was titled "Fridays at Noon" by troublefollows1017. Edward Masen's life intersects with Bella's at the restaurant he dines at for lunch every Friday. He's handsome, arrogant, and is used to avoiding love. She isn't impressed by the things that usually have women falling at his feet. Will she be the one that breaks through and helps him find love?
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/6453369

So, to go along with all these little fic terms, I think we need an HEA (Happily Ever After)

Ingredients
1 oz. Peach Schnapps
1 oz. Cranberry Juice
1 oz. Ginger Ale

Mixing directions
Mix and serve on the rocks.

Until next time, Tweet (FanFicDealer), Message me on Facebook, or email (fanficdealer@gmail.com) if you want to talk shop.

The deal has been made. ;)

::Team Twilight:: Fan Fiction Friday

2012-01-13T17:05:00.000-05:00

Has Breaking Dawn finally left all of your local theaters too? Do you have a giant gaping hole where it used to be? Well, it won't be much longer before you'll be able to own a copy, but until then Lab Tech Andi has found some deliciously movie quality fics that help to soothe your ache. Skip down the path to the blue door behind the shack, knock the sweet guitar melody of "A Twist in My Story" by Secondhand Seranade and whisper the password "Screenplay". Be Safe!

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

The water felt thick as I pulled my body forward with each stroke until I reached the side and pulled myself out. The water in my ears still muted the room, so I started scanning the people sitting around the pool noticing a large crowd over on the bleachers. A few of them shuffled to the side revealing who held them all captivated and I froze. Sitting in the middle of the gathering were Stephenie Meyer and Bill Condon chatting animatedly with the surrounding crowd. I blinked a few times, clearing my head and stood to get my towel. I wrapped myself up and with sudden determination; I headed in their direction to go talk to them.

A hand shot out, grabbing my arm and breaking my focus. Turning my head toward the unwelcome interruption, I was met by a young woman with a frantic look in her eyes. “It’s happened again!” she shouted at me and I turned to quickly glance back at the crowd. Then she shook my arm just enough to get my attention again, “Andi! Do you hear me? It’s happened again!!”

I glared at her not understanding what she was talking about and wanting to tell her I really didn’t care. Whatever it was could wait! Stephenie Meyer was mere feet from me and I raised my arm to point at the crowd, “But –“ I said turning back to the bleachers that were now crowded with even more people.

“Wake up, Andi!” She shook my arm a little harder. “Look! Here’s another Twilight fan fiction that’s been re-worked into an original story!” She shook my arm again and I blinked. When I opened my eyes the room was really bright and on its side. I groaned as I lifted my head to right the world again and blinked at her.

It was one of my authors thrusting her little iPad in my face, “She’s getting published!” She all but shouted at my confused expression. I took the device from her and sat up.

“What are you talking about?” I asked trying to clear the fog of disappointment from my brain. Damnmit! I was so close to meeting Stephenie, even if she was only an imaginary version. Oh well. I read the title of the story my author had pulled up. “Oh yeah, that is a good story. Good for her!” I said handing the story back to her and stretched.

“But SHE’S getting published!!” she said with even more emphasis.

“And…” I prompted.

“They’re talking film attention!”

“And…”

“AND? How can she do that? How DID she do that?” she asked and I understood.

“Ah, I see. Well, she wrote a story that people felt compelled to talk about. It’s how most things are sold or traded.” I told her, getting up from my desk. I was in some serious need of caffeine.

“But it’s fan fiction,” she said following after me.

“The only difference between fan fiction and regular published literature is that the readers of fan fiction have inside knowledge as to one of the influences of that story. Once any story is published, a blind reader may not pick up on any similarities of influence.” I explained pouring myself a cup of coffee.

“I want to be published.” She said rather plainly and leaned against the counter.

I laughed and took a sip of my coffee before I spoke. “Darlin’ you already are, you’re just not getting paid for it.”

“Well, how do I do that?” she asked

“I’ll tell you what; we’ll talk about that, if you help me find some stories. Deal?”

“Deal.” She responded smiling widely and we walked back over to my desk to get back to work.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

With all the fics I’ve seen that have gotten the attention of publishers or even media attention, it really got me to thinking about Hollywood. So, many stories that could be commercially published, but it really all depends on the writer. Some people just love to write and fame really isn’t their goal, but then again… All my deals this week are Hollywood based or something I think should be on the big screen. I hope you enjoy them all.

My first deal is a tale I’ve loved since the very first chapter and would make the best movie called “Clockwork” by Derdriu oFaolain. Bella Swan is an American scientist in 1942 working to help stop the war against Germany, but something feels wrong about her fellow scientists and so she begins to investigate. Meanwhile in 2010, the war with Germany is still going on. Edward Cullen was a scientist for the US military, but after escaping capture in Argentina, has gone AWOL and now suffers from his traumatic past. A chance event allows their paths to cross, but decisions they have not yet made threaten to tear them apart.
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5996248

My next deal is a sweet story set in Hollywood and could probably mirror a real life actor more than our fictional favorites titled, “Reel Life” by sandyk199. Used to feeling lonely in a crowded room, Edward Cullen is on another press junket for his latest film when the last journalist on his schedule breaks through the tedium. Half an hour later, she's gone - or so he thinks. Life in the public eye comes with many challenges and Edward and Bella will have to learn how to overcome them or let them tear them apart. One of my favorite things about this story is Rosalie. She’s not often portrayed as a loving unselfish character, but in this one she honestly just wants everyone to be happy. I just want to hug her.
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5078789

This next story would make the most marvelous chick flick and will only be available until January 25th, it’s called, “Serendipity” by Suzie55. This is a story about finding love, losing love, and finding it again all at the whim of fate. Edward and Bella thought they had it all, the perfect life, until a tragic accident ripped them apart. He thought Bella was gone forever; that’s when fate stepped in again and gave him the opportunity to make her fall in love with him all over again. Will he be able to bring Bella back or has she lost too much to return to a life she has no memory of? You simply MUST read this before she takes it down!
http://www.suzie55.blogspot.com/2012/01/stephenie-meyer-owns-all-things.html

And last I’ll give you this script worthy story called, "Never Sleep in a Strange Man's Bed" by WndrngY. In this tale Bella takes a vacation to Hilton Head Island in South Carolina to meet Alice's new boyfriend, Jasper. Rosalie and Emmett come along, too, making Bella feel even more like a fifth wheel. With Jasper's roommate out of town, Bella has his nice big bed all to herself. Until Edward comes home in the middle of the night... hmmm.
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/4896195

To go along with all these movie type tales, I’m going to recommend an After Eight Martini:

Ingredients
3/4 oz    White Creme de Cacao
3/4 oz    White Creme de Menthe
3/4 oz    Vodka

Directions
Mix and strain into cocktail glass. Garnish with mint sprig or something chocolate.

Until next time, Tweet (FanFicDealer), Message me on Facebook, or email (fanficdealer@gmail.com) if you want to talk shop.

The deal has been made. ;)

::Team Twilight:: Love Shack 2012 Calendar

2012-01-08T22:40:00.004-05:00

Here's a PDF of our completed 2012 calendar. Please feel free to print or save it at no cost.

If you would like a professionally printed and coil bound calendar for $15 plus shipping, we will collect orders via paypal. Just click the buy now button below.

Of course, if you're curious as to what the calendar looks like, here are all the pictures:

::Team Twilight:: Fan Fiction Friday

2012-01-06T05:00:00.003-05:00

Define normal... If normal means reading only self help books and technical manuals, I don't want any part of it. It's a new year and time to get back to what we enjoy. For Lab Tech Andi, this means fics and the authors who pen them. Oh, how we've missed them!! So, don't doddle, all are welcome, just head straight to the blue door at the back of the shack, knock the heavy beat from Aerosmith's “Love in an Elevator” and the password is “Rescued”. Be Safe!

*~*~*~*~*~*~

I stared at the fuzzy image in front of me trying to recognize myself in the surface.

Ding

The brushed metal doors in front of me opened and I stepped forward, out of the elevator into the bland empty hotel hallway. I turned to walk towards my room when a hand swiftly shot out and grabbed me. Startled, I let out a scream, but the small hand covering my mouth muffled it.

"Where in heaven have you been?" Alice said as she moved into view. I breathed a sigh of relief.

"I know you can take the stairs faster than I can ride the elevator, but it can't have been more than a minute since I left you and Rosalie in the lobby, Alice." I replied and rolled my eyes.

She moved her hands over my arms and shoulders, all the while her eyes continued to scan my face as if she was looking for something. “What’s wrong? And where’s Rosalie?” I asked turning my head to see around me, getting more and more anxious.

Stilling herself, she looked me in the eyes and slowly spoke, “Andi, you’ve been missing for four months. Jasper and I are the only ones here, everyone else is in Forks.” She paused to gauge my reaction, but I was too confused to say anything, so she continued. “When you got in that elevator and the doors closed, I lost you. I rushed to the very next floor, but when the doors opened, you were gone, just like my vision. We looked all over to see if we could figure out what happened, but there was just nothing, like you never existed. Then, a couple days ago, I had a vision of you getting off that elevator, so Jasper and I flew back to take you home. Do you remember anything about where you’ve been or what happened? Even the tiniest detail would help.” She wrapped her arms around me. “We’ve been so worried!”

I hugged her back, but still confused, “Uh, I don’t understand.” Alice released me and took a step back. “I’ve been what?? This has to be a joke. Emmett is filming this, isn’t he? I mean, seriously, I just left you guys in the lobby. There is no way it’s December already!” I continued to ramble and spun around. “Okay, guys! Ha! Ha! Very funny, you can come out now!” I spoke into the ceiling as if talking to floating people. Alice put her hand on my arm to stop me.

“Honey, this isn’t a joke and it’s January.” I just looked at her, not blinking, my brain moving in a million directions. Where HAD I been? Was I in the same hotel? How am I even alive? Why wasn’t I more panicked? I turned my head to find Jasper standing behind me. Well, at least that answers one question. I started to laugh.

Alice looked worried and then looked to Jasper. “I think it’s time to take her home.” They turned me in the direction of the stairs and with one on either side, pulled me along.

“Why don’t we just take the elevator? It’ll be easier.” I asked, while Jasper opened the door to the stairwell for us.

“The last time you got in an elevator, it took you four months to go up two floors. I think we’ll chance it with the stairs.” Alice looped her arm around mine and I started to laugh again. Who knew vampires could develop a fear of elevators?

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Back at the lab, Carlisle checked me out and said everything looked ok, but he wanted me to rest for a few days just to make sure, leaving me plenty of time for absolutely nothing. So, my stories this week are a mixture of elevator adventures, lost time stories, and even a kidnapping. Who knows where that will lead? I hope you enjoy.

My first deal up for grabs is this downright awesome tale called “All Fired Up” by MsEerieChastain. What if Edward never came back and Bella had moved on? It’s been eight long years and with a bit of effort, Bella has managed to really make a life out of the broken one Edward left her with. She’s a successful executive with a wonderful boyfriend, what more could she really ask for? Of course, that’s usually when everything starts tumbling down and it all started with the words “Hold the door, please.” Although, I’ll have to tell you that if Edward walked back into my life after eight years, I wouldn’t put up much of a fight, but that’s what I love about this Bella. She’s a fighter and she’s going to make Edward work for every inch he gets. And Edward may not look any different, but he’s no wallflower. He is bold and sexy as hell! Don’t be surprised when you find yourself wanting to tell Bella you’ll take him if she doesn’t want him. This tale should be put on your must read list ASAP!
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/7207959

My next deal will have you turning back the clock in this all human tale titled “Restoration” by texbelle. In high school, six friends were inseparable, but when one of them had to move overseas during their junior year, all of them fall out of balance. Now, it’s ten years later and time for the high school class reunion, but there are changes awaiting them. Will these changes be enough to repair the balance or will it destroy any chance to reclaim what was lost? These lost and found stories are a fun read and this author does an amazing job of letting you see the story from every character’s point of view, which is hilarious when they’re interacting with one another without realizing it.
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/4225985

Ok, I can NOT have a post with elevator stories and overlook including one with sex in an elevator; that would be nearly sacrilege, so I’m giving you “Up” by kimpy0464. This is a one-shot that I adored because it had just the right amount of back story mixed with the right amount of chemistry to make these two seemingly complete strangers explode the day that the electricity goes out while they’re riding together. What also makes it funny is that two hyperaware people can be so oblivious when it comes to each other. If you’re looking for something quick and wonderful, this is your story!
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/6198575

My last deal will hold you hostage until you find “The Perfect Space” by AbidingByRhyme. At 16 years old, Bella & Edward, living in completely different states, had no idea that the other even existed until a vengeful kidnapper brought them together for four months. Neither one understood why he’d chosen them, but as each day passed, they learned a little more about him and each other and started to plan an escape. When they succeed in gaining their freedom and returned home, they find their only solace is in each other, but are they really free now or entrapped by something else? Edward is overcome with the need to protect Bella from any further harm, while she begins to need him in more ways than one. This story brought me to tears a few times and the author does an amazing job of tying in the current day events to flashbacks that are relevant to the situation. I’m completely blown away by this talent because stories like this tend to ramble and lose the reader, but you will feel everything except lost.
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/6138000

To go along with these wonderful fics, I think everyone should’ve been in the elevator with me, so here’s something called a “Mind Eraser” to get you there:

Ingredients
1 oz. Club Soda
1 oz. Coffee Liqueur
1 oz. Vodka

Mixing Directions
Layer the Vodka, Kahlua, and club soda over ice. Drink through a wide straw all at once.

Until next time, Tweet (FanFicDealer), Message me on Facebook, or email (fanficdealer@gmail.com) if you want to talk shop.

The deal has been made. ;)

::Team Breaking Dawn:: Worldwide "Breaking Dawn" Opening Weekend Sales Sets Record for Saga

2011-11-21T20:18:00.002-05:00

The estimated numbers for opening weekend sales of the Twilight Saga "Breaking Dawn Part 1" are in and can I say, WOW!!

In looking at only the domestic box office sales, "Breaking Dawn" came in second to "New Moon", but if you look at the midnight ticket sales and the worldwide totals "Breaking Dawn" rose above and beyond making its debut weekend the fifth-best on record!

Here's a chart of the numbers as gathered by boxofficemojo.com:

In US Dollars (Millions)	Midnight	Domestic Opening Weekend	Overseas Opening Weekend	Worldwide Opening Weekend Totals	Overall Box Office Sales To Date
Twilight		69.6	6.3	75.9	392.6
New Moon	26.27	142.8	132.1	274.9	709.8
Eclipse	30	157.5	104.6	262.1	698.5
Breaking Dawn Part 1	30.3	139.5	144	283.5	283.5

Cbsnews.com stated:

In an industry whose main audience is young males, "Twilight" is a rare blockbuster franchise driven by female viewers. Distributor Summit Entertainment reported that women and girls made up 80 percent of the audience for "Breaking Dawn."

The popularity of "Twilight" has left many men scratching their heads, even those involved in releasing the movies.

"I'm 53 years old, and I haven't figured it out yet," said Richie Fay, head of distribution for Summit. "It relates really to young girls and things that are important to them, their romantic ideas of love and relationships, without getting so physical, at least on screen, that it becomes a worry for their parents."

So, Summit hasn't figured it out?? Really?? The fans have; even the actors understand, so maybe they should have more women promoting to a female fan-base and fewer 53 year-old men, not that their male ignorance has hurt them at all. The Twilight fandom will see to its success with or without the help of Summit.

source: cbsnews.com

::Team Breaking Dawn:: Special Replays of the Twilight Saga Films Leading Up To Breaking Dawn: Plus Bonus Footage!

2011-10-05T15:07:00.000-04:00

We just received the following press release from Summit Entertainment:

NCM Fathom and Summit Entertainment celebrate the upcoming release of the most anticipated movie event of the year, The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn – Part I, by bringing back the first three Twilight Saga films for special one-night engagements. This November, experience the magic and romance that have captivated audiences worldwide all over again, as all three Twilight Saga movies come to the big screen for a 3-night only theatrical event.

Twilight on November 1
- During this first Twilight Saga Tuesdays event, fans will see an exclusive reel that will include behind-the-scenes footage from ComicCon 2008; fan footage from the Twilight Premiere; as well as commentary from cast members about their experiences making Twilight, and how the unprecedented fan turn out set the film and cast on the road to stardom. Also, for the first and only time on the big screen, fans will be treated to a special clip of Robert Pattinson performing the song, “Bella’s Lullaby,” which is featured in Twilight.
The Twilight Saga: New Moon on November 8
- Before the start of the November 8 event, fans will see behind-the-scenes coverage of the filming of The Twilight Saga: New Moon in Italy, as well as footage from other New Moon fan events. �
The Twilight Saga: Eclipse on November 15
- This final event kicks off with exciting footage from one of the largest Hollywood premieres ever with more than 4,500 guests and 5,000 fans in attendance. Cast members will also discuss their favorite scenes from The Twilight Saga: Eclipse and share never-before-seen footage from Comic-Con 2011.

Each event will begin at 7:30 pm (local time)
Twilight Saga Tuesdays will begin with exclusive introductions from the cast members, compelling interviews with the stars answering the questions that Twilight Saga aficionados have always wanted answered and amazing clips from the many fan fests over the years. This special behind-the-scenes content will be immediately followed by the Twilight Saga films.
Showing at more than 730 select theaters across the country, Twilight Saga Tuesdays is the largest event ever distributed to theaters by NCM Fathom. Tickets for Twilight Saga Tuesdays are available at participating theater box offices and online today at www.FathomEvents.com! For a complete list of theater locations and prices, visit the NCM Fathom website (theaters and participants are subject to change).

::Team Breaking Dawn:: Summary of Important Dates Coming Up

2011-09-25T13:45:00.002-04:00

We're in the home stretch now and we have so many release dates coming up, I thought we should have a summary of them just to make sure no one misses a thing. If there's something I've overlooked, let me know and I'll update.

September

26 – Breaking Dawn Soundtrack Track List Preview
27 – “It Will Rain” by Bruno Mars song release

October

You should start seeing the promotional displays during this month!!
1 – Advanced Purchase Tickets go on sale in the US (Fandango & Movietickets)

3 – Breaking Dawn Collector's Edition (The Twilight Saga)

11 – Twilight: The Graphic Novel, Vol. 2 (The Twilight Saga)

11 – Breaking Dawn (The Twilight Saga): Movie Tie-in Cover

11 – Aim High Premiere (USA only) on Facebook web-stream broadcast

18 – Breaking Dawn Part 1 In-Theater Promotional Items will begin to become available.

November

1 - Dr. Cullen's Love Shack Exclusive!! A Month of Breaking Dawn Call-in Event (check out our FB event post for details!)
8 – Breaking Dawn Part 1 Soundtrack available

9 - Dr. Cullen's Love Shack Anniversary!!
11 – Immortals Worldwide Release Date

16 – Breaking Dawn Part 1 France, Italy, and Sweden Release Date

17 – Breaking Dawn Part 1 Australia, Greece, Hungary, New Zealand, Portugal, and Thailand Release Date

18 – Breaking Dawn Part 1 Worldwide Release Date

24 – Breaking Dawn Part 1 Germany, Malaysia, and Singapore Release Date

December

13 – The Twilight Saga Breaking Dawn Part 1: The Official Illustrated Movie Companion

22 – Breaking Dawn Part 1 Hong Kong Release Date

February

25 – Breaking Dawn Part 1 Japan Release Date

Be sure to mark your calendars or bookmark this page!!

::Team Breaking Dawn:: Robert Pattinson Says Birth Scene Could Not Be Toned Down

2011-09-14T08:18:00.001-04:00

Rob says fans will be shocked by how gory the birth scene really is...

Robert Pattinson has revealed that there was "no way" film makers could tone down the gory birth scene in the Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn - Part 1.

The 25-year old star, who previously claimed that his girlfriend Kristen Stewart "looked like an alien" when playing Bella Swan during the shocking scene, has confessed that fans will be surprised how graphic the movie is.

Speaking to Premiere magazine about the scene, where Bella's baby eats her from inside, R-Pattz explained: "It's hilarious. No movie this size dates taking those kind of risks."

He continued: "But since the craziest scenes are a big part of the story going forward, it was impossible to not have them included in the film... There was no way we would tone it down."

Pattinson went on to admit that he believes that David Cronenberg, the director for his latest flick, Cosmopolis, will be stunned by his portrayal of vampire Edward Cullen in Breaking Dawn.

The hunky actor claimed: "I think he's going to enjoy certain scenes, like the one where I open her [Kristen] up by biting through her placenta."

"It was without a doubt the funniest thing I ever had to do. I’d raise my head up and I was covered with cottage cheese or whatever substance they put in there."

Nice! Rob added that when it came to shooting the scene, they wanted to make it as realistic as possible.

He told the mag: "Before filming the scene, Stephenie Meyer, a midwife, Kristen and I sat down to talk to a doctor to decide where I was supposed to bite if this situation would ever occur in real life."

Pattinson added: "The doctor looked at us a bit puzzled and said: ‘I don’t think you could ever do this in real life.'"

*From last night's new trailer, How gruesome do you really think it will be?*

SOURCE

Breaking Dawn Part 1 Convention - ~Summer

2011-09-01T22:30:00.000-04:00

Your invitation has arrived for the most eagerly awaited fan event of 2011

Summit Entertainment and Creation Entertainment present

OFFICIAL FAN CONVENTION

Friday evening, November 4th, through
Sunday morning, November 6th, 2011

The Hyatt Regency Century Plaza
2025 Avenue of the Stars
Los Angeles, California, 90067

To make your hotel room reservation CLICK HERE
If you need additional assistance for hotel room booking ONLY,
please call 888-421-1442

Full convention information will be available soon at
www.twilightconvention.com

You can also sign up for our free email bulletins
and we will update information when available.

::Team Twilight:: Sinful Story Sunday

2011-08-28T18:06:00.000-04:00

The air is heavy and thick with worries and things to do. I know you’re looking for a distraction, something to save you from what makes your insides ache. You want something sinful to sink your teeth into. Well, look no further, Lab Tech Andi’s sharing a few of her favorite lustful dealing to help cure what ails ya. So, head down the overgrown path to the blue door at the back of the shack, knock the beat from “Escape” by Muse and the password is “Retreat”. Be Safe!

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

I sat in the clearing just outside the shack gazing up at a cloudless Brazilian sky. Renesmee was pointing out constellations to me and further explaining their significance.

“Do you see that one, right there?” I nodded my head at her question. “That one is Carina, the backbone structure of the ship Argo, which carried Jason and the Argonauts to retrieve the Golden Fleece. And that one right there?” I nodded again. “Zafrina says that one is my Jacob, Canis Major because he’s the alpha in his pack.” I giggled at her statement and she looked at me puzzling.

“I’m sorry, Zafrina’s right about that, Jacob is the Alpha, but why does she think that particular one is Jacob?” I asked and she smiled back at me, turning to the sky once more.

“Because it’s right beside that constellation right there, do you see that one?” Her tiny hand pointed to a star directly above the constellation she had pointed out before and then swept across the sky to another star. “That one right there is me, the Water Serpent. You know, because Jake calls me Nessie.” Upon hearing her statement, I closed my eyes and threw my head back laughing heartily and when I opened my eyes again, the Brazilian sky was gone and the cloud covered Washington sky had returned.

For the past three weeks, Edward, Bella, Renesmee, and Jacob had all been down in Brazil. Edward and Bella had been reliving their honeymoon on Isle Esme, while Renesmee and Jacob spent time with the Amazon Coven. Zafrina was very excited to have Nessie down there, that she planned all sorts of excursions, some to local tribes for Jake and others to see new and interesting things. Since they’d returned, Nessie loved showing me all the things she did on her trip, and her gift was so much better than any video camera or regular camera she could have used to film it.

Tonight I had quietly complained that it was too cloudy to go star gazing and now that summer was ending, it would soon be too cold to sit out at all. That’s when Renesmee has grabbed my hand any lead me to a clearing close by. I suppose I should have known better than to even whisper my thoughts around people who could every sound within a hundred yards.

“Andi, Daddy had that same reaction when I told him what Zafrina said, why is that so funny?” she asked just appearing curious instead of irritated, for which I was grateful.

“Nessie, it’s only because everyone remembers how much your mama disliked him calling you that in the beginning. It sort of had to grow on her.” I explained and she smiled back at me.

“I remember that, but I didn’t understand then. I guess it is kinda funny,” her little musical laugh echoed off the surrounding trees. Then I heard a deeper tone join hers and soon Edward and Bella appeared in the clearing too.

“Was she showing you the stars?” Bella asked and I nodded. “She loves to show everyone that; come on Nessie, it’s time to head home.”

“Awww, but there’s still so much I haven’t shown her yet.” Nessie complained as she sprang to her feet.

“You can show her another night, I’m sure Andi has things to do anyway.” Bella explained and Nessie leaped into her Mother’s arms.

“Your mama’s right Nessie, I do have things to do, but maybe you can come back soon and we’ll roast marshmallows and hot dogs over a bonfire.”

She crinkled her nose and said, “No hot dogs, those are horrible.”

I laughed, “Ok, no hot dogs, just marshmallows and ghost stories.”

“Yes! Yes! I have some that Senna and Kachiri told me that are really scary!” and she wiggled her little fingers in the air as if that would make then even more frightening.

We said our good nights and I turned back in the direction of the shack. Along the way I pondered, wouldn’t it be wonderful to have the ability to bring back summer whenever you wanted it or just be somewhere else entirely anytime you needed it, just like Nessie does with her memories.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

So all the stories I have for you, have summer in some way, but they all tack you somewhere else, somewhere peaceful. This way when the weather finally changes and the mind needs somewhere to go, these authors can take you. Enjoy!

A beautiful story with a series of summers called "For the Summer" by camoozle. Year after year Bella and Emmett help their father, Charlie run the marina that he owns in a tiny Arizona town situated along the Colorado River. For most of the year, there’s barely a soul there, but in the summers it’s booming with vacationers, or as Emmett likes to call them “Pay Checks”. Even at 11 year-old, Bella knew she had things to do to make the marina run smoothly, but that’s the year she met a very special “Pay Check”. A young boy, with fiery hair that would transform every summer into an opportunity for discovery for the next 17 years.
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5934882

This is a beautiful one-shot titled “I Carry Your Heart With Me” by Amethyst Jackson. Bella volunteers to give Renee some alone time with her new boyfriend and spend the summer in Forks with her father. What she never counted on was meeting Edward, the sexy and soulful musician. What about when the summer is over? You’ll have to read and find out.
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5143561

This is a sultry distraction titled “Summer of Salt” by lola-pops. The heat wave lingers on a lake front cabin where the Swan’s and the Hale’s spent their summers. Jasper, Rose, and Bella have always looked forward to their time together, but the year that the Cullen’s acquire the Newton cabin changes everything for everyone, even the overly cocky quarterback Edward Cullen. None of them will be able to return to the life they once knew.
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5589694

A beautiful tale to drag you back to your first crush titled “The Longest Summer” by lexiecullen17. For most of Bella’s childhood, she’s spent every summer at the camp at Long Lake and for the past five years she spent every night dream of the emerald eyes of camp counselor, Edward. Bella has always been one of Edward’s favorite campers so, how do you think Edward will feel about working with her as a fellow counselor? Will they finally be able to fully reveal their feelings?
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5445804

What would a summer or an escape by without thoughts of a beach, so to go along with our sinful theme, I’d recommend a little “Sex on the Beach”.

Ingredients
0.5 full Cranberry juice
0.75 oz. Peach Schnapps
0.5 full Pineapple Juice
1 oz. Vodka

Mixing Instructions
Put in vodka and peach schnapps and then fill remainder with half each of the juices. Stir in highball glass.

Until next time, Tweet (FanFicDealer), Message me on Facebook, or email (fanficdealer@gmail.com) if you want to talk shop.

The deal has been made. ;)

::Team Twilight:: Fan Fiction Friday

2011-07-29T00:00:00.000-04:00

Oh, how everybody loves their drama! Between government drama, neighbor drama, and movie release drama, Lab Tech Andi just wants to put all the drama back where it belongs, back in her happy place. To accomplish this she’s bringing in her favorite Tech Team with their thick rimmed glasses and love of comic book characters. So, head to the blue door at the back of the shack, knock the funky beat of “Geek in the Pink” by Jason Mraz and the password is “Reboot”. Be Safe!

*~*~*~*~*~*~

“This DAMN COMPUTER!!!” I yelled as I banged my fists on the keyboard. This was the fifth time, it had frozen on me in the last hour and I was reaching my limit. I picked up the keyboard to throw it across the lab, but just as it left my hand, Alice materialized right in front of me and caught it. While Jasper flashed behind me, placing his hand on my shoulder and my body slumped down into the chair.

“Andi, you’re going to break it if you keep this up.” Alice said as she put the keyboard back on my desk.

“What difference would it make?” I leaned forward putting my face in my hands. “It’s constantly freezing, there’s a delay when I type, it won’t read anything off my flash drive, and the internet keeps dropping. I’m losing my mind.”

“No you’re not, you just need a break.” Soothed the deep baritone voice and I raised my head to see Emmett leaning down in front of me.

I made a move to stand and mumbled, “I need geekier friends, Emmett.”

“What am I? Chopped liver?” Jasper said with mock irritation. “I can fix this hunk o’ junk and it’ll be better than anything the ‘Geek Squad’ could do.” And I laughed even though I knew Jasper was perfectly capable.

“Ok, tech Jasper, do your worst.” and I turned to hug him. “Thanks.”

“Now, it’s time for you to leave!” Alice said grabbing my hand and pushing me toward Emmett. “Take her away; Rose is waiting!!”

“Waiting for what? Where am I going?” I looked between the three of them when Emmett snatched me up and threw me over his shoulder.

“It’s a surprise.” Then he laughed the most devious laugh I’d ever heard from him and watched the shack get smaller and smaller as we raced away.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Still without a clue as to where we headed, I sat in the back seat watching the scenery blur passed; my mind back in my geekless lab. ‘Perhaps we could kidnap one of those’ I thought and giggled to myself. So all my dealings this week contain characters of the super sexy geeky variety, because the brain has to be the sexiest organ of all, right?

First, I’m offering up an amazing little tale called “Animate Me” by abstract way. In this is sexy story, Edward is a professional animator for Animation Nation and the one thing that he’s absolutely certain about is that he’s an incredible artist. However, Edward has one little issue, he’s a tad socially inept and the girl he worships is cartoon exec for Animation Nation, Bella Swan. He’s loved her from afar for a while and the only way he’s been able to get close to her is to draw her every night in his self-published comic book. So when he steps in to help a friend by working at a computer store and the object of his obsession walks through the door looking for a “thingy”, will they find out they have more in common than just working for the same company?
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/6989390

Next, I found a tale of two geeks in this adorably funny story titled “Geek Love” by SassenachWench. Edward and Bella are web geeks working for the same marketing company. Their relationship is fun and easy and because they work together Edward figures there’s no way to claim her. Until he can’t take the jealousy anymore and he begins the fight of his life to win over the girl he can’t have.
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5327102

Next is a very lemony fluffy tale titled “Computer Repair” by Jayeliwood. Edward is a major teenage geek and Bella-well, she isn't. Although, when Edward overhears that she has computer troubles he offers to lend her a helping hand. What happens after he fixes her computer is not something he would have ever expected and it’s turned his world on its side.
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/4494177

Next, I’ve got a very cute and nerdy one-shot called “IF BELLA YES” by mothlights. The year is 1977, and aspiring programmer, Edward Cullen walks into a shop called Vinyl Frontier to attempt to check out his sister’s new boyfriend, only to find that the woman in the record shop is his seventh grade crush – the impulsive and incomparable Bella Swan.
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5621288

And then I found smutty little one-shot titled “Geek Squad to the Rescue” by 4theluvofMary. Bella is an author of romance novels, while her real life is pretty much lacking in that department. There’s no art imitating life here until her computer crashes. Her track record with the Geek Squad has never been the greatest, but without any other options she grudgingly she calls them up for assistance. To her surprise, a hottie with glasses arrives at her door, willing and able to help her out with ALL of her problems.
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/4538118

And last, but certainly not least, I found this amazingly adorable tale called “Sittin' On The Shelf” by cutie sstb. Despite the fact that she entirely over qualified, Bella has been working at Emmett's comic shop for the past 3 years. Spending her days trying to get Edward's attention and yet, Edward is oblivious to the fact that she fancies him. Will our Ednerd realize she adores him or remain in the dark? Alice has a plan…
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5749235

To go along with these fics I would usually recommend something of the adult variety, but this time I think I’m going to suggest something befitting these geeky tales and that would be Starbucks. Here’s a copy cat recipe for their “Caramel Macchiato” in the event you want to make something at home.

Ingredients
2 tablespoons Starbucks' Vanilla Syrup
1/2 cup fresh brewed espresso
8 ounces steamed milk
3 to 4 tablespoons Starbucks' Caramel Sauce

Instructions
Add vanilla syrup to 16oz glass.
Add steamed milk and caramel sauce and stir well.

Until next time, Tweet (FanFicDealer), Message me on Facebook, or email (fanficdealer@gmail.com) if you want to talk shop.

The deal has been made. ;)

::Team Twilight:: Fan Fiction Friday

2011-07-15T14:04:00.002-04:00

You’ve been under this spell for a while and now that it’s over, we mourn its loss. As lovers of fiction, we’ve adopted some characters as family; watched them grow in print and then on screen, but the adventure has to end sometime, right? So, Lab Tech Andi is casing her own spell and bidding a fond farewell to Harry Potter with just a few magical deals she came across. So point your broomstick toward the blue door at the back of the shack, knock the heavy beat of “Stupify” by Disturbed and the password is “Alohomora”. Be Safe!

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

I felt him hovering just behind me, his cool breath danced along the flesh of my neck. I knew that my pulse was increasing with each exhale and tap-tap-tap of my fingers. He breathed out once more making me shiver.

“What is taking you so long?” he growled low in my ear and I whirled around on him in frustration.

“Emmett McCarty Cullen! I would get this done faster if you would just leave me ALONE!!” I growled back at him and turned back to my keyboard. “Rose, can’t you please get him to leave me alone? I’m begging you!” I said under my breath knowing that she’d still be able to hear me. Emmett walked to the front of my desk and leaned in until he was mere millimeters from my face. I raised my eyes to his ochre ones, sucked in a controlled breath and blew in his face, “Go. Away.”

“You’re going to make us late!” he stated and then banged his hand on my desk making me jump a little and paced away from my desk.

“Leave Andi alone, Emmett” Rosalie said as she continued to casually flip though the magazine in her lap. “She’s not going to make us late for anything.”

“But she is!” he pouted and I suspect he was only attempting to gain an ally. It wasn’t working. Rose just rolled her eyes. He walked back over to stand behind me. “You type so slowly!! Move, I’ll type!” and as I felt his massive hands begin to curl around the tops of my arms like he was going to move me himself, the lilting piano of Dashboard Confessional’s ‘Blame it on the Changes’ began to stream from his pocket, Alice’s ringtone.

“But… Fine.” He stabbed at his phone and roughly shoved it back in his pocket as he walked away from me.

“Alice told you to leave me alone, didn’t she?” I asked and giggled a little continuing to type.

“Yes, but if you don’t hurry up, I’m going to ignore her.” He fumed from the other side of the room.

“Emmett, it’s just movie,” I pleaded from my chair but the statement only made him speed to me and invade my space again.

“Only a MOVIE! ONLY A MOVIE!!” He turned his head to Rose, “She thinks this is only a movie!” He threw his hand in the air and forced a laugh then slammed his hand back on my desk. “THIS, you silly girl, is NOT just some MOVIE!! It’s the LAST HARRY POTTER MOVIE!! There will not be anymore after this one!! This IS IT!! AND I DON’T WANT TO MISS IT! YOU’RE GOING TO MAKE ME MISS IT!!”

Calmly, I put my hands on my desk and rose from my chair making my nose touch his, “It’s not like they’re going to destroy the movie once they show it. Besides, you guys have a private theater! It won’t even start until we get there! You WON’T MISS ANYTHING! Now. Go. Away.” I moved to sit back down and he snapped his teeth at me, but I didn’t flinch. Rose giggled at my fearlessness.

“Come here Emmett and let her finish,” Rose cooed patting the cushion next to her. “She’ll never get done if you keep interrupting her. Come.”

It was the most alluring thing I’d ever seen Rosalie do, but it worked to get Emmett away from my desk and I tap-tap-tapped as fast as my little fingers could tap, so that Emmett could go see his movie.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

So in honor of the very last Harry Potter film, I’m paying homage to magic and the magical and even found a way for the Cullen’s to help Harry crossover. I hope you enjoy.

First, I’m giving you a tale with little hidden magic called “An Untitled Continuation of the Twilight Saga” by gothicfictionfan. It’s been almost six years after Bella became a vampire and the Cullen family has moved once more to start again. With Renesmee almost an adult the family has decided to enroll her in a private all-girls school while the rest of her family begins classes at the nearby public school. But a new beginning doesn’t necessarily mean that danger doesn’t lurk around the corner. Will the Cullen’s be able to fight off this new unfamiliar threat?
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/4847870

Second, I found a bit of otherworldly magic in “The Mirrors” by adorablecullens. Some families have secrets that go back generations and are so mythical they could only be the inventions of fairytales or the insane. As a child, Teddy discovered a doorway into another world and found a kindred spirit. At first he wondered if it was just a very realistic dream, but when his doorway is suddenly lost with the destruction of a family heirloom, his life is forever changed. Now as an adult, can Edward let down his carefully constructed shield and open himself back up to magic and love when he meets a beautiful - and hauntingly familiar - woman in real life?
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/4971734

Lastly, I give you a tale that takes you all the way to Hogwarts called “The Secret Keeper” by A. E. Giggle. Bella and the Cullen’s have been through so much and after being victorious against Victoria and the newborns, they thought all their danger was gone. At least until Bella’s bracelet begins to heat up, alerting her to dangerous events unfolding at her old school, Hogwarts. That’s right, Bella has a secret of her own and now she has no choice but to inform the Cullen’s of her true, magical identity. To put it simply ... she's a Witch and Voldemort is after Harry. Now, she and the Cullen’s will join in the battle to fight off the Death Eaters and save Hogwarts.
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5244652

To go along with these magical tales, I thought I’d find something that might be a magical ingredient called “Vipers Venom”

Ingredients:
1oz Cinnamon Schnapps
3 Scoops Ice Cream
1oz Peach Schnapps
1oz Sambuca

Mixing Instructions:
Blend Ice Cream till it is smooth. Add the Peach Schnapps blend. Add Sambuca Blend. And add Cinnamon Schnapps and blend. Pour into bowl or glass for a milkshake.

Until next time, Tweet (FanFicDealer), Message me on Facebook, or email (fanficdealer@gmail.com) if you want to talk shop.

The deal has been made. ;)

::Team Twilight:: Fan Fiction Friday

2011-07-08T11:39:00.007-04:00

I'm sure you've been shaking with need, digging around for that next hit, scraping by with anything you could get your hands on, but Lab Tech Andi is in her own recovery and has put together a few tales that are sure to let you escape whatever hell you're in too. So head to the back of the shack, knock the beats of "Good Life" by OneRepublic and the password is "Rescue". Be Safe!

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

It was like I’d been living at the bottom of the ocean these past few weeks; I usually thrived under stress, but lately all I could feel was its weight bearing down on me. Slowly, I felt myself surfacing like I was swimming through a heavy syrup; my brain only half functioning. On the edges of my consciousness, I couldn't hear the voices trying to pull me further out of my dream-state.

“Andi, you need to get up! Can she even hear us?” Bella said just a few inches from my head.

“Oh, I'm quite certain she can hear us,” Alice responded. “In fact, she should be awake in another 32 seconds.”

I rolled over trying to bat them away, but they swiftly moved out of the path of my swinging arm. “Go away!” I pleaded to them. “Why won't you just leave me be?”

“Because we have let you be for too long now. The addicts need you, the authors are worried about you, and quite frankly, I'm tired of watching you sit around here all day.” Bella said as she pulled me into a sitting position. “You need to get back into the routine of things, you have things to do.”

“But I don’t even know what to give them.” I rolled over again, this time to face them. “Alice, look into the future and tell me what stories they want.”

“Andi,” Alice sat down beside me, “you know I won’t know that unless you’ve already made up your mind yourself. Besides, it’s not like you haven’t been reading. Just give them something that you like and the rest of it will come together.”

“Are you sure?”

“We’re sure!” They said in unison which made me giggle a little.

“Ok, but if I get this together, can we do something fun?” I asked dragging myself out of bed.

“Definitely!” Bella told me as she pushed me toward the bathroom. “Now get a move on, we don’t have time to waste!”

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Then I began thinking, what would I give my poor neglected addicts? Something fun? Something dark? Something I’ve loved? Alright, then here goes…

First, I’ll give you a tale that makes me laugh quite often called “Spirit of '76” by spanglemaker9. It's July 4th, 1976, and all of New York City has cut loose to celebrate - everyone except Edward Cullen. But Emmett refuses to let him sink any further into the family mold and insists they head into the city without a single plan. Of course that’s when they bump into two very modern girls who seem to remain just slightly out of reach. Will they ever manage to catch them? The whole one-shot is awesome and this author never disappoints, but I think the funniest part of this story is the image of Emmett in bell bottom pants and platform shoes. It’s just so Emmett.
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/6281686

Next I’ll give you a story by a fairly new author that I picked up only for the simple reason that he has a way with painting pictures with words called “The Photographer” by BellasBritishNerd. Edward and Bella have known each other since high school, were even best friends, but once she moved away under the pretence of attending college, their level of communication suffered and Edward wasn’t sure he’d ever hear from her again, even if he couldn’t ever stop loving her. However, fate works in funny ways and even when you think you have everything you want; do you ever really have everything you need? Will their continued lack of communication eat away at the thread-bare amount of trust they had to begin with? This story is not a happy one and this Edward is sexy, but pretty rough around the edges. So if you like your Edward’s a tad on the raw side, I know you’ll love this tale too.
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/7114690

Finally, I’ll give you a tale that’s a beautiful struggle called “Never Bargained For You” by SpringHale. Edward Cullen, a PhD candidate in English Literature and father of two little girls, wishes he could change his past when his wife, Tanya, suddenly up and disappears without a warning. In search of understanding, he seeks out the guidance of an author who has inspired him to find a new purpose in life, Bella Swan. However, Bella has her own turmoil from a failing celebrity marriage and simply wants to delve into something new so she won’t have to think much about her own life. How will these two souls help each other mend as they blur the line between student and mentor? What I love about this story is that it makes you think about more than the characters; it makes you really want to know what moves them. Read this and you’ll want to know them too.
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/6193469

Now to go along with these little beauties, I think I’ll recommend a Cranberry Lifesaver:

Ingredients
2oz Amaretto
1oz Cranberry juice

Mixing Instructions
Mix together with crushed ice in a glass and garnish with mint leaves

Until next time, Tweet (FanFicDealer), Message me on Facebook, or email (fanficdealer@gmail.com) if you want to talk shop.

The deal has been made. ;)

::Team Love Shack:: NEW BREAKING DAWN QUOTE TSHIRTS!!!!

2011-07-04T20:03:00.002-04:00

::Team Twilight:: Fan Fiction Friday

2011-06-17T23:57:00.008-04:00

You’ve been so patient and waited for me to regain my wits, for which I’m eternally grateful!! I think I shall reward my lovely addicts with gifts of Dadward!! After all it, it will be Father’s Day on Sunday and our swoon-worthy Edward Cullen will be another year older on Monday. Therefore, I suggest you head to the Blue door at the back of the shack, knock the heavy beats of “Sleep Isabella” by Abney Park and the password is “Daddy”. Be Safe!

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Yet again, I open the door to the lab and out tumbles a stream of notes so beautiful, they make your heart melt at the sound. It’s the sort of sound that paints pictures with notes. It’s amazing and wonderful and so welcome that I can hardly stay focused on what I’m actually supposed to accomplish today. The amazing thing about all of this is that the notes sweeping me away from my currently reality are not being played my usual keyboard musician, but by the guitar strumming of his inherently talented offspring.

For the past several days, Jasper and Renesmee had been camped out in one corner of the lab preparing a song for Edward’s Father’s Day and Birthday gift. Edward had once made a passing comment to Renesmee that he would teach her how to play the guitar one day and lately he’d been asking if she was ready. What he didn’t know was that she wanted to surprise him and to do that she’d begged her Uncle Jasper to give her lessons in the lab. I didn’t even realize Jasper knew how to play the guitar, but I guess there are still lots of things I don’t know about them.

Renesmee was a natural at music though, just like her father. I’d watched it happen not long ago when Edward had sat with her at the keyboard and played Bella’s lullaby while the authors and I swooned from our seats. After he struck the final cord, she crawled onto his lap, placed her tiny hands on the keys and copied his movements exactly. It was a spectacular thing to witness and very entertaining to see Edward attempt to contain his complete and utter astonishment.

One of the recent side-effects of Renesmee’s songs was the imagery they conjured while she played them. It was almost as if the talent was an extension of her ability to project images by touch. All she really had to do was play a song and your mind would be taken over with pictures. I hadn’t noticed this effect when Edward was giving her lessons, but she wasn’t playing her own music then either. Right now she was composing and it really was magical, but unlike the images you saw when she touched you, if you managed to block out her music, you could block out the pictures too. Although, who’d want to? They were like little vacations without ever having to leave home.

And a little vacation was exactly what I needed. I think Alice could see that too. She’d popped in a time or two, while Jazz and Nessie were in here, but mostly she stayed away letting me get absorbed by the sounds around me. It was perfect and I knew that Edward would love it. So come Sunday, Renesmee would be able to dazzle everyone with her talent and it would be the most perfect Father’s Day ever.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

With Father’s day in mind, all the dealing I picked out contain fathers, some good, some bad, some who want to be better. I hope you enjoy.

My first tale, is a period piece titled “To Be in Her Light” by sunflowersongs Edward Masen, the Viscount Cullen, is not a very good man. Up until his father’s death, he has lead an incredibly sinful existence which has given him two illegitimate daughters. Despite the fact that he has no idea how to be a father to these two little girls, he’s not about to deny them either. So with the assistance of his staff, he employs Miss Isabella Swan to be his children's governess, but finds himself drawn to her in unreasonable ways. However, their stations in life and his past might not lead to happiness.
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5905059

Next, I found this amazingly hot Dadward in “Playing Doctor” by lexiecullen17. Edward Cullen is a young, single dad, whose just been abandoned by his girlfriend with their infant son. This was not the life he had planned and it’s certainly not been easy, but he knows he’ll find a way to make it work. So, when his son's pediatrician, the lovely Dr. Swan, offers to help out, if ever he needs it, will he take her up on that offer? This short is a very beautifully long and slow burn of a one-shot, but completely worth it.
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5424248/

Last, I have a long awaited mystery called “A Beautiful Lie” by Brindalyn. Edward and Bella have been friends since childhood and have shared nearly everything, but at the age of seventeen, they’ll find their paths go in different directions. He’ll become a star and she’ll stay in the sleepy town they grew up in, raising his son, a son he knew nothing about. A son she hid from him to allow him to live out his dream and protect them both. Will this secret be too much to keep from him when this is the only man she’ll ever love?
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/4605391/

Now to go along with these tales, I’m going to suggest a simple bottle of your favorite wine, just to soothe that craving for children.

I hope you all have an excellent Father's Day and until next week, Tweet (FanFicDealer), Message me on Facebook, or email (fanficdealer@gmail.com) if you want to talk shop.

The deal has been made. ;)

::Team Twilight:: Storybook Saturday

2011-06-04T23:33:00.009-04:00

You’ve been so patient. You’ve wait for things to come together and finally, you will be rewarded. Lab Tech Andi has just been swamped lately, but thankfully the Cullen’s know how important your addictions are and would never deprive you of the thing you desire most. So Bella’s dug through Andi’s computer to find to fics that could rival the promised trailer on Sunday. When you’re ready, make your way to the blue door at the back of the shack, knock out the sweet melodic guitar from “If You Find Her” by Future of Forestry, and the password is “Forever”. Be Safe!

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

“Did your wedding look like that, Momma?” Renesmee asked beside me as she watched the short video Andi had playing on one of the nearby screens not that she was watching it.

“No baby, our ceremony was in the living room, not outside,” I explained and turned back to the computer.

“Was your hair like that?”

“It was close; Aunt Rose did a much better job on my hair than those stylists did on that actress’ hair.”

“Well, did they get any of it right?” She asked appearing to get slightly exasperated.

“We won’t know for sure until the movie comes out, but I’m sure it’ll be fine.” Then I heard Andi begin to stir on the other side of the room and I glanced in her direction for a second. She still appeared a sleep. So I continued on with my mission.

This week had been a complete nightmare for her; other obligations had been driving her blood pressure through the roof and I could hear it struggle to flow through her veins even from this distance. Alice had sent me here the other night, saying that Andi was in trouble. By the time Edward and I burst through the door of the lab, she was curled up on the floor in a sobbing heap.

I tried to ask her what was wrong, but she couldn’t even form a coherent sound. Edward tried to decipher her thoughts, but said it was all just ones and zeros; nothing that made sense to him. We eventually got her off the floor and Edward looked her over, just to make sure she wasn’t injured and then he sang just like he does for Renesmee at bedtime; like he used to do for me when I used to sleep. Eventually, her sobs calmed and then she was asleep. While she slept, Edward could better see her thoughts. He said it was just stress and sleep would help her.

“What about Friday?” I ask Edward. “I doubt she has anything prepared and she not in any condition to put anything together either.”

“Oh Love, we’ll just have to say she’s unavailable this week, I’m sure people will understand.”

“What if I put them out?” I asked. “We’ve all done it before, but it’s just that Friday is a little too close and I don’t have a clue what she has in that computer.”

“Bella, I’m sure it will all work out if you want to do it.” Edward reassured me. “I’m certain Andi would appreciate it.”

“Ok, then I’d better see what I have to work with,” I told him as I rose to my feet and he pulled me in close for a long lingering kiss. I opened my mind to him as we kissed, letting him know what he was doing to me and as I pulled away I simply whispered, “Later”.

He responded with a growl and as I walked away, he swatted my behind growling the words “wicked woman” under his breath. When I looked back at him, he had the most angelic smile on his face, which made me giggle knowing he was anything but.

I got on Andi’s computer and there was so much there, I couldn’t figure out how she ever found anything. I’d been sifting through files for a while when Renesmee popped in with Alice and she dragged him away to help with something. I hadn’t even paid any attention to what was playing on any of the other screens until Renesmee started asking me questions about our wedding. I stopped to watch it for a moment and remembered how nervous I was that day; how beautiful everything was; how perfect our wedding night was. I was still lost in thought when Edward came back through the door.

“Come up with anything yet?”

“Nope,” that’s when I noticed what he had in his hands. “Why did you bring our wedding album?”

“Alice said I should show it to Renesmee,” he said looking at her and she immediately jumped into his arms.

“Yes, Daddy! Please!” she exclaimed, “These wedding clips are so short. I want to know about your wedding!”

“Ah, now I understand,” he said as he glanced at the screen and then over to me and winked. “Let’s go over here and leave mommy alone. We’ll look at some real wedding pictures.” I giggled.

With my attention back on the screen before me, I suddenly knew what I had to find and my path was clear. They had to be here somewhere; I just had to keep going.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

So with my own wedding on my mind, I searched to find a few stories about weddings. I hope the ones I found will tide you over until the trailer is released.

The first wedding I found was a tale called “I Thee Wed” by SydneyAlice. Wedding planners, Bella Swan and Alice Whitlock, are hired to plan the wedding of the year. The only thing is that the groom has been mysteriously MIA for a while and the bride is going out of town for a few weeks. As final details of the wedding are coming together, Bella is going to have to work closely with this groom. What happens when she breaks the cardinal rule of wedding planning and falls for the groom? How will Edward be able to keep his promise without breaking the heart of the woman he truly loves?
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/6596606

Next, I found a wedding tragedy in a story titled, “Eight Years Later” by jmeyer. It’s been 8 long years since Edward left Bella on their wedding day. But after quite a bit of effort, she’s managed to fake her way into a normal existence. Despite the difficultly of coming back, Forks has always been her home and she misses Charlie, so she’s finally come back to Forks. Only when she arrives, she discovers Edward has also returned with a BIG secret. Everything is different and that really shouldn’t be possible since Edward was a vampire, right?
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/4428342

The third wedding I found was also a small tragedy called “Picture Windows” by nerac. Bella has the picture perfect life on the horizon, but a week before her wedding, tragedy strikes and her fiancé is suddenly taken. While recovering from losing the love of her life, she meets a stranger in a hauntingly familiar way. Could he have been sent by her late fiancé?
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5135527

Lastly, I found another wedding planner in a short and sweet tale called, “True Companion” by bellamarie117. Bella Swan always believed in happily ever afters. So, when she marries her high school sweetheart and starts her own wedding business, she thinks she's living her dream. Until it all comes to a rather abrupt end. Can it be possible that she was really destined for someone else all along and has worked beside him off and on for years?
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/6876336

Now because of all the excitement that Sunday promises to bring, I’m just going to recommend you pull out a bottle of Champagne to celebrate.

So hopefully, Andi will recover and all will be better next week. Until then, Tweet (FanFicDealer), Message Andi on Facebook, or email (fanficdealer@gmail.com) if you want to talk shop.

The deal has been made. ;)

::Team Twilight:: Fan Fiction Friday

2011-05-27T21:57:00.012-04:00

OMG! Can someone tell me what year it is?? I just know the world had ended and I’ve been fighting my way back from hell ever since!! What a week! Thankfully, it’s a holiday weekend and I’m so looking forward to sitting back with a big drink and a smartphone full of fics. If you want to join me, race to the blue door at the back of the shack, knock the techno beat of Daft Punk's "Derezzed" and the pass phrase is “Start your engines!”. Be Safe!

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

The week has been exhausting! The lab has had so much going on and still so much left to do that by the time I fell into bed, I began dreaming almost as soon as I closed my eyes. The dreams were so strange and real.

At first, I heard music, it played all around me and it was sweet. The voices that made up my dream song were smooth and lilting. Pushing and pulling me, in different directions and then lifting me. Then suddenly I was flying. I felt the cold on my skin, the breeze in my hair. I began to shiver and pulled my blankets tighter.

Eventually, I settled and rested my weary body on a cloud. The soft wispy mist surrounding me; embracing me, pulling me deeper into sleep. The scent of the air carried that of lilacs, lavender, apple, and vanilla. I smiled and breathed in deeply, taking in the scent, filling my body with its presence and giving into the weight I felt bearing down on me.

The weight holding me down began to lift and I was floating again. Flying swiftly towards somewhere unknown and landing on earth so soft, warm, and comfortable that I relaxed once again into its embrace and ever so slowly my dream faded into darkness.

The light was strange when I opened my eyes and everything was the wrong color. My brain wasn’t quite functioning, but while I continued to blink, taking in my surroundings. This was not my room, or at least not the room I fell asleep in. Where was I? Before the panic could completely take over, I felt the bed dip beside me and a hand on my shoulder bringing with it an immediate calm; I didn’t need to turn to know it was Jasper.

Alice appeared in front of me, “I’m so glad you’re finally awake!” she said bouncing on her toes. “Now get up and get dressed. I want to get to the track!”

“Whoa, slow down there pixie woman!” I told her as I sat up and look at the both of them. “I know I didn’t fall asleep in a hotel room, so where are we?”

“We are in Tokyo, my dear Andi, now get dressed!”

“Excuse me?” I continued to blink at her. “Did you say Tokyo? Please tell me that’s some random tiny town in the continental United States!”

“Nope, Japan. Now if you don’t dress yourself, I’m going to have to dress you myself. They’re all getting track time without me!!” she exclaimed.

“Ok, ok, not like I packed. What do I have to wear?”

“Here put this on,” she said as tossed me some clothes and left the room with Jasper. I shook my head and got out of bed to get ready for whatever awaited me.

Emerging from the bedroom, I was quickly pulled to a car and we were on our way to… “Alice, where are we going?”

“There’s a race track that’s not far from here and every once in a while we have our own little race. Most of the time it’s just us, but occasionally a random nomad will join us. That’s when Rose is really in her element! She loves to show off her tuning skills. Though, today we’re going against Jacob’s pack.” She smiled slyly.

I laughed knowing Jacob would quickly accept that kind of challenge. “So are you racing?” I asked her.

“Of course!” she said as if it were obvious.

As we continued on our trip to the race track, I wondered who else would be racing and who would win. “Hey Alice, can’t you already see who’s going to win?”

“Nope, because the wolves are here and too many decisions haven’t been made yet.”

Hmmm… Then this should be interesting…

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

With racing in mind and it also being the weekend for the Indy 500, all my dealings came to me fast. They have fast cars, fast drivers, and a few have fast relationships. I hope you enjoy!

First in line, I have a speedy tale called “Up to Speed” by ericastwilight. Over-confident, playboy, race car driver, Edward Cullen, is just not having the best luck. Since wrecking yet another car, most of his sponsors are dropping him which is now leaving him and his team short on funds. At this point they need a miracle in order to keep Edward behind the wheel, and that’s when their prayers are answered. Bella Swan is one of the most brilliant engineers on the planet and she’s decided Edward Cullen is going to be her next project. Will she succeed in making him the best and help him win the Sprint Cup?
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/4486464

Next in line, I found “Feel Good Drag” by JasperSAYSrelax128. Bella lived in Phoenix with her mom and step-dad and unknown to them she’s one of the top street racers in Arizona. But when a recent race ends up in a police chase, Renee decides to send her to live with Charlie in Forks, WA, thinking that it will get her away from the racing lifestyle. What she doesn’t know is that is that there’s an underground racing site that only allows boys to race? Will Bella be able to resist being an active participant? How do you think she’ll get around their rules?
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5299809

Third in line, I found something with a little wear and tear, but still pretty fast called “Chasing Victory” by mpg. Edward and Bella were high school sweethearts, but he still wasn’t sure he was ready for commitment. Until he overheard Bella talking in her sleep about marriage, he freaked out and broke up with her. Both have been trying to move on ever since. Then Edward’s career as a race-car driver starts to go downhill and he just has to get away for a while and Carlisle lets him borrow his place in London. Imagine his surprise when on his flight to London, he’s seated by none other than Bella Swan.
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5687435

And Finally, I just couldn’t resist this Indy car tale called “This Year's Girl” by EtrnlPsyche. In an effort to find Edward Masen, famous Indy car driver, a date for a banquet and a little publicity, Jasper Whitlock creates a contest for some lucky fan to win a one night date with Edward. Alice is a big fan of racing and when she sees the ads for the contest, she just knows this is the perfect way to distract her friend Bella from her current destructive relationship with a guy named James. By some miracle she wins, but what should have only been one night, turns into something infinitely more.
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/4674144

And since racing really needs more of them, I suggest a little drink called a “Woman Driver”:

Ingredients
2 oz. Liqueur, melon (Midori)
1 oz. Schnapps, peach
1 oz. Vodka
1 splash Cranberry Juice
3 oz. Orange Juice

Mixing Instructions
Fill glass with ice. Add O.J., schnapps, and vodka. Tilt glass to side and slowly pour Midori down side of glass so that it sinks to the bottom. Splash with cranberry juice.

While I recover from my week in hell, I hope you all have a great weekend and until next week, Tweet (FanFicDealer), Message me on Facebook, or email (fanficdealer@gmail.com) if you want to talk shop.

The deal has been made. ;)

::Team Twilight:: Fan Fiction Friday

2011-05-20T14:37:00.010-04:00

My Lovely Addicts, I’m so saddened that this may very well be my last post. It’s so difficult when things come to an end; it’s really been such a wonderful journey and I’m so honored that you have allowed me to be your dealer. With that said, if this be the end, I, Lab Tech Andi, have taken extra time to pick out a few that I know you would truly regret missing. Therefore, I want you to race to the blue door behind the shack, knock the melody of R.E.M.’s song, “It’s the end of the world as we know it” and the password is “Judgment Day”. Be Safe!

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Ever since I’d discovered an app for my phone that would read my latest obsessions to me, I’d listened to the monotone, computer generated voice stream through my headphones everyday on my way to work. So, when I pushed open the door to the lab and was assaulted by darkness and the smell of popcorn, I was completely unprepared.

As I reached for the light switch, I pulled the earbuds out of my ears and the mechanical voice was immediately replaced by the voice of Arnold Schwarzenegger:

“Chill out, dickwad.”
“Great! See, you're getting it!”
“No problemo.”

I turned toward the flat screen to confirm what I was hearing and what I saw made me want to laugh. There was a mountain of pillows setup right in front of the screen, Emmett was perched on the top of the mound as if he were royalty and every single one of my authors were scattered around him passing around huge bowls of popcorn. On the screen, Arnold was talking to a young boy.

“Anyone care to explain what’s going on here?” I asked to the group who hadn’t even noticed I’d walked in.

“Shhhh,” Emmett said in my direction, looking slightly annoyed. “It’s Judgment Day and you’re about as noisy as a herd of elephants. We’re trying to watch the movie, Andi!”

“Well, excuse me, but last I checked, this is my lab and those are my authors and currently they aren’t doing anything.” I argued back at him.

“Awe, come on,” Emmett whined. “According to the internet, it’ll be the end of the world on Saturday and if it really is the end, what difference will it make if they take one day off.”

“Oh really?” I countered. “And what does Alice say? Does she think the end is near?”

“Well, no.”

“See! It is not the end of the world and my authors have things to do.”

“But it’s The Terminator 2: Judgment Day and we still have 2 more Terminator movies to go.”

“Fine Emmett, watch your movies and the authors can stay with you, but I want them back to work when the movies are done.” I turned and rolled my eyes to myself. “I’ll figure out something else to deal on Friday.”

As I walked over to my desk, I heard Arnold’s voice fill the room, “Hasta la vista, baby.” I closed my eyes and shook my head.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Well, since apparently the internet people are claiming Armageddon and Emmett has hi-jacked my authors in favor of The Terminator, I’ve picked out 10 complete epic tales because you obviously won’t have time to get any updates and if you haven’t read them yet, you absolutely have to read them before the world ends. So, here hoping you have the time to enjoy them.

In “Our Lives Unbound” by theladyingrey42, Edward is a socially awkward writer, that’s completely given up on finding the right woman and has convinced his brother to set him up. So, week after monotonous week, he stares into the eyes of a stranger, answering the same questions over and over again, until one day the eyes that look back aren’t so ordinary. Then suddenly he’s then one asking questions too. Will this be what he was looking for all along?

http://www.fanfiction.net/s/6046442

In “Last Tango in Forks” by AwesomeSauce76, When Bella’s father is injured in the line of duty; she decides to move back in with him to take care for him. But the monotony of it all, along with her job, is slowly eating away at her sanity. Then, one day at the gym she sees an opportunity, she knows she has to check out, it’s an apartment. Some place she could be herself. However, what she walks in on, she would never suspect. Could a chance encounter with a mysterious stranger change everything?

http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5918985

In “Parachute” by KitsuShel, Bella is an 18 year-old college student, simply going shopping with her friends when she finds a tiny 3 year old boy, dirty and hungry wandering around in an alley. In no time at all Bella completely falls in love with this tiny child and decides to adopt him, raising him as her own when no one steps forward to claim him. All the while keep up hope that she’ll one day find his family and after five years, her search is finally successful and they’ve been looking for him too. So, how did this little boy end up in the middle of two families? Will he be able to bring them together?

http://www.fanfiction.net/s/6036478

In “High Anxiety” by EdwardsBloodType, to escape her nightmarish high school existence in California, Bella returns to Forks to live with her father. When she reunites with old friends, she hears about the Cullen boys that live down the block who have issues of their own. However after her first day at a new school, her stress level is up and she seriously needs something to relax. That’s when she finds out Edward might have exactly what she never thought she needed and they may have more in common than they ever dreamed of.

http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5222490

In “Hit By Destiny” by ocdmess, Bella wants to die, and almost gets her wish fulfilled when she gets hit by a shiny Volvo. She is left with serious injuries, and the only thing keeping her from dying is the person who hit her.

http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5463682

In “The Plan” by QuantumFizzx, Bella has held this job for just a little over a year and for during that year, she’s nearly been transparent, but all that’s about to change. She’s tired of going unnoticed so she puts a plan in motion to catch the eye of Edward Cullen. At least that's her plan, but what fate has planned is something entirely different.

http://www.fanfiction.net/s/6550419

In “Emancipation Proclamation” by kharizzmatik, set in 2005, Edward grew up in a mafia life of money, power, & respect. Isabella, born into slavery, has never known another way. When their worlds come together, will they be able to stay the same? Will he be able to give her freedom and still keep her?

http://kharizzmatik-ep.blogspot.com/

In “Confessions of a Nanny” by Melissa228 Dr. Edward Cullen, has found it difficult to trust anyone since his wife abandoned him and their 4 year old daughter, but the demands of his job require 24 hour help in the care of his daughter, so he looks into hiring a full time nanny. Bella’s looking for something better than bartending, so this opportunity is exactly what she’s looking for. However, living under the same roof may prove to be a challenge of restraint. Will they be able to co-exist without breaking each other?

http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5051088

In “Taste of Innocence” by Nolebucgrl, Edward Masen has spent years devouring the tainted blood of the truly evil, ridding the world of monsters of the human kind, but he’s growing tired of his usual fare. He’s looking for something different, an innocent. This is when he stumbles upon his latest victim, Bella Swan, of course. In a last minute decision, he decides to change her instead of killing her. Will he regret his choice? Will she be accepting of this change or will she hate him for what he’s done to her?

http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5412456

In “Harvest Moon” by content1, ever wonder what happened to the Cullen family after the Volturi left? As Edward and Bella finally begin a life together, their lives will change in more ways than they would ever imagine. Additions will bring them joy, loved ones lost will bring them pain, and just the act of growing up will change all their lives. Not to mention was probably not the last we’ve heard from the Volturi and the mess they left behind might not work out exactly how they expected it to.

http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5315616

Now if it the end if the world, there’s no way I’m making something complicated, so to go with these epic fics I suggest you make a large glass of Vodka Lemonade.

10 oz Country Time Lemonade Mix
1 oz Vodka

Mixing Directions

Mix two together and serve with ice or no ice

So, I guess we’ll see if the world really does end tomorrow and if it doesn’t, you’ll find me here next week with a few new tales to deal out. Until then, Tweet (FanFicDealer), Message me on Facebook, or email (fanficdealer@gmail.com) if you want to talk shop.

The deal has been made. ;)

:: Team Eclipse :: Twilight Music Featured on Dancing with the Stars

2011-05-17T15:01:00.000-04:00

So here is Sia's My Love. It is amazing what this couple did with the music and the Waltz. It sent chills through me and made me love the song even more!!

Hope you enjoy it!!

source You Tube

:: Team Twilight :: Blue Foundation's Eyes on Fire featured on Dancing with the Stars

2011-05-17T14:49:00.000-04:00

Twilight is EVERYWHERE!!!!!! My sister brought these two espoides of Dancing with the Stars (I don't watch it) to my attention last night. This one, the couple danced to Blue Foundation's Eyes On Fire from the Twilight Motion Picture Soundtrack.

After watching it, I had to post it!! It sent chills through me as they danced a Rumba to it and really told a story with the movements and music!!!

Hope you enjoy!

source: YouTube

::Team Twilight:: Fan Fiction Friday

2011-05-13T13:15:00.011-04:00

In the twi-universe this day should practically be a holiday for today is Mr. Robert Pattinson’s 25th Birthday. All over the internet you’ll find twi-blogs celebrating in their own ways, but since it’s Friday at the Love Shack, Lab Tech Andi has found a few marvelous fics that demonstrate just how great it really is to be 25. So, head to the blue door at the back of the shack, knock 25 times and when you’re asked for the password, in your best breathy Marilyn Monroe voice, sing: “Happy Birthday to You, Happy Birthday to You, Happy Birthday Mr. Pattinson, Happy Birthday to You!” Be Safe!

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

On this day 25 years ago:

“West End Girls” by The Pet Shop Boys was number one on the Billboards charts.
In the United States:
The Average Cost of new house was around $89,430.00
The Average Income per year was about $22,400.00
If you rented where you lived, you might have paid around $385.00 per month
If you bought a new car it was around $9,255.00 and a gallon of gas was only 89 cents
A Casio Portable Color Television would have set you back around $249.99
If you were lucky enough, you might have had a Tandy 600 Portable Computer which would have cost around $1599.00

In the United Kingdom:

A house would have cost around 44,040 pounds
A Gallon of Petrol was an astonishing 1.89 pounds
And in a hospital in London, a tiny Robert Douglas Thomas Pattinson was born.

So, considering that none of the Cullens could even remember the age of 25, I knew they wouldn’t be any help to me on this one. Turning 25 is a big step and although we all want to wish Rob the happiest of birthdays, I wanted to take the time to tell our darling man all the things that are great about turning 25, so earlier this week I asked “What sort of things do you think he should look forward to at this age? What's great about 25?”

Well, for one, dearest Rob, your car insurance will go down, because now they’ll finally consider you a man. To celebrate this little milestone, I truly feel you should take a road trip. See the largest ball of yarn, the biggest bottle of ketchup, sleep in a teepee, just hit the back roads and let the wind whip through your hair.

Next, you’ll be able to rent a car without an underage surcharge. Not really sure how much of a concern this was for you, since I doubt you rent your own cars, but hey there you go.

Then one of our lovely members on our Facebook page, a Ms. Jennifer, commented, “You really start discovering who you are. Things that used to seem soooo all-important suddenly aren't that important in the scheme of things. You start to worry less about gaining other people's approval and more about achieving what you want for no reason other than fulfilling your own self.” You might not be there yet, but these are wise words and I know you’ll get there once you finally get the chance to breathe.

Once you reach this age, (assuming they’ll let you) you’ll be able to celebrate your birthday with a very small group of people without all the fanfare, if that’s how you want it and no one will fuss at you for it.

You’ll soon come to understand why investing in good shoes, good sheets, and good tires is completely and totally worthwhile. You can finally make peace with your quirks and understand that people love you because of those things.

It’s finally acceptable to buy good quality furniture for your house without feeling like you’re only “pretending” to be a grown-up.

And of course there were a few suggestions of looking forward to sex with older women. However, I’ll leave that one up to you to work out with the Cougars. ;)

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

In celebration of our fun recommendations, I thought I’d find a few tales that play off our list so I visited some fellow pimps at The Lemonade Stand to help me find tales that were road trip worthy and Cougarlious. Enjoy!

My first little road trip took me to “Running for Home” by ooza. Edward has never really felt loved or wanted and upon the deathbed of his last known relative, he discovers why. Now all alone, he sets out on a road trip to self discovery. A simple wrong turn leads him to cross paths with Bella, a young woman looking for a break from the expectations everyone else has for her. She’s always been the responsible one, making decisions to please everyone else, but she just can’t take it anymore. By risking it all and joining together to travel a path that’s a little unfamiliar, they may come to find that the destination really isn’t so unknown, but not exactly what they expected either.
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5792699/

Next, I ended up spend time in “Cougar Town” by OzellaMarie. Where Bella Swan is 42 years old and recently divorced from a man who couldn’t stay true. Now that her 25 year-old son, Jasper, has a thriving auto repair business of his own and is about to tie the knot, she feels like she’s starting over again. She’s completely free and the only person she has to take care of is herself. So when her son’s business partner, Edward Cullen, starts making regular appearances in her fantasies, will be open enough to make these fantasies real? What if she’s not the only one with fantasies?
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/6809492/

Once I escaped their clutches I was on the road again in a sweet little one shot called “Free” by GreenEyedGirl17. Bella and Edward have spent every waking minute together in the same tiny, boring town all their lives as best friends. However, graduation approaches they can’t stop talking about taking one last adventure before the distance of college separates them. So with a great deal of planning, they embark on a road trip that may possibly change everything they thought they knew about each other.
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/6197524/

But the cougars finally caught up to me in this lust one shot titled “In The Light of Day” by TKegl. Here, Bella Swan just found out that her ex-husband is engaged to the woman who broke up their marriage. In an attempt to self medicate her woes, her well meaning friends decide she needs to get drunk and get laid. So, when Mr. Right Now shows up and turns out to be half her age, she’s just a little leery, but three orgasms later and age is no long an issue. Knowing that she’d never intended this to turn into anything; she was out of his bed before dawn. But karma had other plans and when Mr. Right Now turns into Mr. Boss Man, will they be able to get passed this?
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5860538/

Now I was also informed by Ms. Anja, that in Denmark, it’s a tradition if a person isn't married before turning 25, they get lots and lots of cinnamon. So instead of cake I think all these fics should have “Cinnamon Rolls”

Ingredients
2 packages dry yeast
1/2 cup hot water
1/3 cup sugar
1/2 tsp sugar
4 1/2 cups flour
1 teaspoon salt
1 cup hot milk
1/3 cup vegetable oil
2 eggs

Filling
1/2 cup butter
1 cup brown sugar
1/2 cup white sugar
2 tablespoons cinnamon

Icing
1 cup powdered sugar
2 tablespoons hot milk
1 teaspoon vanilla
Mix bread ingredients in food processor. Let rise. Roll out. Spread with butter. Sprinkle rest of filling ingredients over. Roll up. Cut into slices. Place

in greased pans. Let rise. Bake at 350 for 20-25 minutes. Cool and ice.

But if you’re not the baking type, here’s something to help quench you’re thirst, it’s an “Apple-Cinnamon Martini”

Ingredients
3/4oz Apple Schnapps (Apple Pucker)
1/4oz Cinnamon Schnapps (Goldschlager)
2oz Vodka

Mixing Directions
In a mixing glass filled with ice, combine vodka, apple pucker, and goldschlager. Shake and strain into a chilled cocktail glass.

So, Happy Birthday Rob and until next week. Tweet (FanFicDealer), Message me on Facebook, or email (fanficdealer@gmail.com) if you want to talk shop.

The deal has been made. ;)

::Team Twilight:: Fan Fiction Friday

2011-05-06T05:00:00.001-04:00

Oh Darlin’, are you looking for that perfect gift for that wonderful lady in your life, the one you call Mom? Maybe you want a gift to give yourself? If that’s the case, Lab Tech Andi might have something just in your size. All you have to do is find the blue door at the back of the shack, knock out the guitar riffs from ELO’s song "Ma-Ma-Ma Belle" and the password is “Momma”. Be Safe!

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

I swirled my brush in the yellow paint and then swept it over the clay mug I’d been handed. While I loaded my brush with more paint, I took in the vision before me and it made me smile.

When I got up this morning, the only thing I had planned was to get up, take a shower, get dressed, and head to the lab, but as soon as I’d opened my door to head out to my car, there stood Alice, beside a silver Volvo, in my driveway.

“Give me your briefcase and get in the car, you’re coming with us.” She commanded, grabbing my things from me and racing to throw them in the trunk. I bent down to peer inside and saw Rose sitting behind the wheel and Renesmee waving wildly from the backseat. I laughed a little as I stood and heard a car door open. “Come on, slow poke! Get in the car already!” she whined as I slid into the backseat with Nessie. By the time I heard my car door close, she was sitting in the seat in front of me.

“Well, this is an interesting surprise!” I said to no one in particular, “Any special reason you’ve come to drive me to the shack this morning?”

“We’re not going to the shack this morning” Nessie answered bouncing in her seat. “We’re taking you to paint pottery!”

I raised my eyebrows and looked around the car, “Pottery?”

“Well, you know Mother’s Day is coming up and Bella is so funny about gifts,” Rose began to explain, “so we knew that Nessie couldn’t just buy her mother something.”

“However, if she made something for her mother,” Alice continued with a mischievous grin. “Then Bella would have no reason to refuse it.”

“Okay… so why am I here?” I asked.

“Because, Andi, it’ll be fun!” Nessie replied as though it was the most obvious answer in the world. Alice and Rose just laughed and we continued on to the pottery place.

The place was deserted when we got there, but I knew that was probably only because it was so early. I walked around the studio looking at the items that had already been painted, glazed, and ready for pick up. I also saw several interesting glass pieces, some made into jewelry. “This is very pretty. Is it painted?” I asked examining one of the pieces.

“No, that’s fused glass.” The proprietor stated. “We have several kits over there.” He pointed to the back wall.

“Oh, I’m going to do that!” Rose said grabbing a kit from the shelf and then settling herself at a table. The rest of us wandered along the back wall looking at all the things, just waiting to be painted. Renesmee carefully selected a trinket box with a beautifully sculpted fairy sitting serenely on top.

“I think Momma will like this, don’t you?” she said as she skipped over to show me.

“I completely agree!” I told her looking at the box.

“Hey Andi! Here’s what you need to paint.” Alice said as she crossed the room clutching the largest coffee mug I’d ever seen.

“What on earth do I need that for?” I asked laughing.

“For fun, what else?” she told me as she handed it to me. “Now let’s sit down and Nessie, I’ll help you with yours.”

Now, I knew there was no way I could create a design as intricate as the one Alice was trying to help Renesmee paint on those fairy wings, so I just kept it simple and they were right, this was really fun!

It took all of the morning and a good part of the afternoon, but by the time we left, Nessie had painted a fairy with wings that practically appeared transparent even though they weren’t; Rose had created some amazing glass earrings for Esme for Mother’s Day; and I had painted a gigantic and completely impractical coffee mug. As we handed over our creations to be glazed and fired, the shop owner told us we could pick up our things in a couple days.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

As we headed back, I thought about all of the wonderful mothers in our lives, the ones that love us beyond reason. And so, being inspired, all my tales today feature our two favorite mothers. I hope you enjoy!

My first little motherly tale is something all mothers learn to put up with “Six Interruptions” by Brynna. From the moment Esme and Carlisle came together, it was destined that at some point, each of the Cullen kids would intrude upon at least one intimate moment for the first time. Throughout the many decades they’ve been together, this is a peek at each of those interruptions. This tale is cute and a few of the reasons behind those interruptions may just surprise you.
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/4686034

My next motherly tale is a bit like life, titled “La Dolce Vita: Hollywood Living” by johnnyboy7. Bella is taking her son and starting over in Los Angeles, leaving behind an abusive past and a dark secret. But just because she had a plan, that doesn’t mean that’s where she was destined to be. Edward is a widowed mega movie star, with two children and the insane notion that he’ll never fall in love again. However, when their sons’ become fast friends, they’ll find themselves being hurdled into a frenzied Hollywood romance. Will they burn out as quickly as the rest of Hollywood? Will Bella be able to keep her secrets forever? This is a wonderfully complex story, with a plot that always keeps you on your toes. For a change, the Edward in this tale has dealt with most of his demons and doesn’t feel unworthy of Bella’s love. He just wants something honest and true, but can he handle the truth?
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5865291

My next tale may not have kids in it, but is a wonderfully light Esme piece called “Guide to Losing a Player in One Date” by sleepyvalentina. Set in 1986, Carlisle Cullen, a first-year med student, was not only at the top of his class, but he'd also been rumored to have been on top of the majority of his female classmates. Now, in a gross anatomy lab, Esme Masen, has found herself stuck with him as a lab partner. Will she be able to resist his smooth player moves or will she find a way to beat him at his own game? This story is actually a series of dates and not just one, but the titles for each chapter will have you laughing all by themselves.
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5915660

And lastly, I had to bring back Mom-ella in this little tale titled “Play Dates” by SarahCullen17. Bella is a young single mother of a five-year-old son, Emerson. She doesn’t have much, but she’s smart and manages to make due. Because her son has kept her so busy, a love life has never been high on her priority list. That is until her son becomes slightly smitten with little five-year-old Emmy, Edward’s only daughter. He too is a young single parent, just trying to make ends meet, so the idea of dating has been the furthest thing from his mind. But what if your kids insisted? Play dates could be a lot more interesting.
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/6502829

So, I think to go along with these deals, we need a mom-worthy drink, so I suggest a “Blushing Lady”

Ingredients

1 oz PAMA Pomegranate Liqueur
2 oz vodka
1 oz pink grapefruit juice
lemon wedge
coarse sugar for rimming

Mixing Instructions

Rub a wedge of lemon around the rim of a martini glass and dip the glass into a plate of coarse sugar. Set it aside. Pour the remaining ingredients into a cocktail shaker with ice.
Shake and strain into the garnish martini glass.

I hope you all have a marvelous Mother's Day and until next week. Tweet (FanFicDealer), Message me on Facebook, or email (fanficdealer@gmail.com) if you want to talk shop.

The deal has been made. ;)

::Team Love Shack:: NEW BREAKING DAWN QUOTE TSHIRTS!!!!

2011-04-30T14:45:00.005-04:00

TEAM LOVE SHACK presents our limited edition Breaking Dawn Shirts!!!! Get yours today! Shipping rates are $2.00 for US shipping if you need international shipping please send a message to me cullenloveshack@yahoo.com for rates for your address.

::Team Twilight:: Fan Fiction Friday

2011-04-29T10:13:00.012-04:00

Yeah, I know you’re hiding that phone under your desk just awaiting an update. You’re trying to hide your addiction from everybody else. You might even have yourself convinced that you can stop anytime you want, but you can’t ever hide it from me. We both know the truth and there’s no rehab for this addiction. Of course, you’re secret is safe with me and Lab Tech Andi has a few secrets too. She’ll be happy to let you in on a few if you head to the blue door at the back of the shack, knock the hi-hat beat from “Who Are You” by The Who and the password is “Buzzsaw”. Be Safe!

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

“Hey, did you hear that Edward Cullen is now working in some shop off South Forks Avenue?”

“Oh my god! No Way!”

“I know right? I caught a glimpse of him the other day and I could hardly believe it! Wasn’t he supposed to be at some Ivy League school on the east coast?”

“Yea, I always figured he'd be a doctor like his dad. I guess getting married to Bella didn't do him any favors.”

“No joke!”

I tried really hard not to listen, but I just couldn’t help it. I was supposed to be getting post-its and highlighters, but I just couldn’t believe this crazy conversation that I was overhearing in the office supply store. So when I got back to the shack and found Alice and Nessie playing chess in the lab, I just had to know.

“Alice, is there some reason why Edward is working in a store on Forks Avenue?” I asked.

“What are you talking about, Andi? Edward doesn't work anywhere.” she responded without even looking up from the board and moved her knight.

“I didn’t think so, but while I was at the office supply, I overheard two girls gossiping about how Edward was working at some store over there.”

Alice concentrated less than a second and then looked back at me. “No, I don't see him taking a job anytime soon. I suppose I'll have to go see for myself.” Then she turned to Renesmee. “Hey Nessie, you wanna go see if your daddy has a doppelganger?” Alice asked.

“Oh, that sounds like fun!” she replied jumping from her spot and then the two of them were off.

Several hours later, Alice and Nessie reappeared in the lab laughing.

“Oh Andi! Those people must be blind!” She said between gasps.

“So you found him!” I jumped up from my desk and skipped over to them.

“Gosh, it’s not like it was hard.” Nessie stated while she set up a game of Monopoly and Alice composed herself.

“Yeah, his name is Ian Barnes and he even has a website called 'My Name Is Not Edward'. We stalked him for a little while and Nessie was going to walk up to him, but then some little boy behind her started to freak out so we bolted. I mean, I guess I can see a little resemblance to that Robert Pattinson guy,” Alice told me as she folded herself onto the floor, “but he doesn’t look anything like Edward!”

“Well, you do realize that you’re working with vampire vision right?” I replied. “Maybe it's that imperfect human vision that makes him look so much like Edward.”

“I guess that could be it or it could be that people see what they want to see.” Alice shrugged and took a stack of paper from Renesmee.

“I suppose,” I hummed, then Renesmee handed me a small stack of papers. I looked down at what she gave me, “What’s this for?”

“You’re going to play a game with us,” Renesmee stated matter of factly as she finished setting up the board.

“Okay, one game and then back to work.” I agreed and then I started to wonder if we could get a Bella doppelganger to move here too. How cool would that be?

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

While I pondered the identities of our town’s citizens, I wondered if they’d ever get to live their own lives again. So, all the dealing I have for you today are having an identity crisis. I hope you enjoy them.

My first identity was found in the form of an erotic fairytale called “Cinderella A Tale of Lust” by TrueBlood Twilight. For the most part this is simply a retelling of the classic story, but it has a slight erotic twist. Edward is an insatiable prince who’s not looking to fall in love and why should he? He can have any of his servants at anytime. Bella is a beautiful and loving lady who only wants to protect those she loves from her evil step-mother. Even if that means becoming a servant in her own home. But a fateful trip to the market may change everything for both of them.
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5641473

My next little identity was found in this very short tale of “Mistaken Identity” by notsoinnocentfangirl. Ever since the popularity of that dreaded vampire movie, Edward simply can’t go anywhere anymore without people pulling at his clothes and screaming some actors name. It’s annoying and to be honest, he doesn’t really see why other people can’t tell the difference. One day, the tables will be turned and people will be calling that actor Edward, but for now this is his life. The description of this story may sound silly, but it will have you laughing like nothing else. It’s a great read for something light.
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5500651

This next identity was hidden in a tale called “Reassigned Identity” by Mk Marie. Bella Swan has got to have the worst dating record in history! If they’re not complete morons, then they’re the murdering offspring of mobsters. Edward Cullen is the CIA Agent who has sworn to protect her and keep her alive, but will his dark secrets cripple his ability to do just that? After witnessing a horrible murder, Bella is put under witness protection where she must pose as "Agent Cullen's" wife. Will they be able to keep this professional and not let personal feeling get in the way?
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5402769

My final identity is a dark one called “The Hunter” by kaybebaby. When Catherine Hardwicke hires a young, unknown actor to play the lead in her new vampire movie "Twilight," Kristen Stewart is convinced from the start that something is not quite right about him. The team laughs off her bizarre theories - but what if she is right? What if the actor playing Edward Cullen is just pretending to be Robert Pattinson? What if the true identity of this man is not that of a young aspiring actor from London, but something completely different - an ancient Transylvanian vampire on the prowl for revenge and blood? I know you may be leery about fic that uses really people, but trust me; this tale is exciting and will take you on an unusually dark ride.
http://twilighted.net/viewstory.php?sid=4754

Since all of these tales have hidden identities in them, I think we need a drink that’s hiding something too. I call it “Undercover” and what it’s hiding, I’ll never tell.

Ingredients
1 shot Rum, spiced (Captain Morgan's)
8 oz. Cherry Coke Zero
1 piece Cherries/Maraschinos

Mixing Instructions
Preferably in a pint glass, although a highball glass will do, throw in one shot of spiced rum and fill the glass with Cherry Coke Zero. Next, stab a cherry with a toothpick and use this to stir the drink between 1-3 times. Drop cherry and toothpick into glass as a garnish.

I hope you enjoy the many faces of our favorite characters and that they'll hold you until next week. Tweet (FanFicDealer), Message me on Facebook, or email (fanficdealer@gmail.com) if you want to talk shop.

The deal has been made. ;)

:: Team Breaking Dawn :: Entertainment Weekly New Covers!

2011-04-28T11:47:00.000-04:00

And life just doesn't get any better with Breaking Dawn news!! Looking around today, I spotted a post from EW.com about a Breaking Dawn cover and all I can say is W O W!!! They have two covers, one for Team Edward fans and one for those who dig the dogs. I will be buying both, just to collect them all!

They have a few new pictures from Breaking Dawn Part 1, which hits newstands tomorrow!

At least they got the eggs right!! LOL

Here is the link for EW and some more pics! http://www.ew.com/ew/gallery/0,,20308569_20485406,00.html
Source: Twilighters Anonymous (check out their post here) http://twilightersanonymous.com/entertainment-weekly-features-duo-breaking-dawn-covers-with-kristen-stewart-robert-pattinson-and-taylor-lautner.html

::Team Twilight:: Fan Fiction Friday

2011-04-22T10:22:00.008-04:00

Hey! Has it been a long week for you like it's been for me? I know all I really want to do is shut everything else out and curl up in my happy place to be entertained without distraction. To cleanse my soul of the woes of the week and bask in the bright light of something wonderful. Well if you're looking for that escape, Lab tech Andi may have found a few ways to escape even if you only get a minute or two. So head on over to the blue door at the back of the shack, knock the beautiful melody of Tchaikovsky's "Swan Lake No. 9" and the password is "Dancer". Be Safe!

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

It was strangely chilly, so instead of reading at my desk, I’d pulled out the huge mound of pillows and nestled myself in the fluffy mess with my netbook propped up on a chill mat in my lap. Paying very little attention to anything else, I didn’t even notice when the daylight began to fade, slowly being replaced by the darkness of the night.

Hypnotized by the latest tale to grace my screen, I was startled by the music and small animated video that hijacked my screen. The video had several tiny ballet dancers leaping gracefully across the screen and played the music from Swan Lake. As the music came to a close, the letters for an animated invitation flashed before my eyes. It was an invitation to attend a dance recital for Renesmee, in her own performance of Swan Lake that very evening.

I looked at the clock on my cell phone. “Oh my, I’ll never make it there in time!”

“Yes you will” sang Alice’s bell-like voice, as she danced through the door, flinging a garment bag at me. “But you still need to hurry.” She informed. So, I flew into the bathroom to change and we were in the yellow Porche in barely a blink.

“Well, this was very sudden. I didn’t know Renesmee was studying ballet.” I said as Alice drove.

“Actually, it’s not. Nessie has been dancing around since she could walk and you know Rose and I are always trying to create a lifetime of pictures and videos to make her cover more realistic.” She explained. “Then Edward started playing some Tchaikovsky for her and when she realized it was called Swan Lake AND it was a ballet, she began suckering Emmett and Jacob into watching every filmed rendition, even some obscure Russian version on YouTube.” Alice giggled and elaborated further. “So, Rose and I thought this would be the perfect opportunity to create an illusion of dance classes.”

“Well, there’s more than one dancer in Swan Lake, who’s dancing with her?” I questioned, knowing that Alice and Rose would probably be involved. “And is she good.”

“She’s perfect!” Alice responded in near shock. “Of course, Rose and I will be dancing. We tried to talk Bella into it, but even with her new grace, she flatly refused. I think she still harbors some fear of ballet because of James.” Alice rolled her eyes. “But I’m not revealing anything else, you’ll just have to wait and see.”

It was only a few more short minutes in the car and then I was being taken to my seat behind Esme. Once I was seated, she leaned back and whispered, “They wouldn’t let me watch them practice today. So this will be a surprise for me too. I don’t know why, but I’m so nervous for them.”

“Oh, Esme! It’s perfectly natural to be nervous, I’m sure they’ll be perfect.” I responded with a smile. Then I began to look around myself and noticed a few authors, Sam and Emily, Leah, Seth, and Sue were all sitting beside Charlie, even tiny Claire was there sitting very patiently in Quil’s lap. It was still nearly surreal to know that the pack would do anything to make Renesmee happy. The lights dimmed and the curtains parted, taking that as a sign, I sat back in my seat to watch the show.

Nessie danced around the stage, in perfect form and motion. Alice was right, it was perfect. Then the evil sorcerer appeared to turn the dancing girl into a swan and who better to play that part than Emmett. He was dressed all in black with black ballet tights. I giggled at the sudden sight. Thankfully for my sanity, the black didn’t accentuate what the tights had the ability to reveal.

The performance continued and when it was time for the Prince to make his appearance, out leapt Jacob, donning his own ballet tights that hid almost nothing. He was not in the least graceful, but you could tell he was trying and you have to appreciate the effort he was making. He stumbled a few times, making it so very difficult not to laugh, but I held it in and continued to watch.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

As I watched, I started to wonder if Bella really would have been that graceful, if Alice and Rose had managed to talk her into it. So when I got back to the lab, I stared the research to find out.

My first performance came from “If You were Mine” by ThexInvisiblexGirl. Bella Swan has just been accepted to Julliard and she can hardly believe her good fortune. She’s been dancing for as long as she can remember and this is her dream come true. Then by some bizarre coincidence, a boy from where her father lives not only plays for her audition, but shares a class with her. The only issue is that she has a boyfriend. What will happen? You’ll have to read it to find out.

http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5366872

My next performance is not of the usual variety “I Will Follow You Into The Dark" by SydneyAlice. Dr. Edward Cullen falls hard for Bella Swan, an exotic dancer in one of Seattle's nightclubs the very first time he sees her. What’s odd is that his brother Emmett seems to know her, and knew that she was supposed to be dancing on Broadway. However, Bella has secrets she’s not quite willing to share and once she’s exposed will he be able to look passed them? Trying to escape their haunted pasts, will they be able to find love for the first time?

http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5186191

The finale to my little deals is “Learn You Inside Out” by wolfpgirl. Bella is a college student and reluctant dancer/cheerleader, trying to move on. Edward is a rebel and thinks he’s all that since he’s the new quarterback, but there’s a reason why the whole world knows the reputation of Edward Cullen and it’s not because he bakes cookies for the homeless. An arrangement will bring these two unlikely people together, but trials of the present and the darkness of their past will threaten to tear them apart.

http://www.fanfiction.net/s/4807057

Now for something to go along with these performances, I’ve been inspired by the Russian version and recommend a “Russian Apple”

Ingredients
1 part Cranberry juice
1 part Pineapple Juice
1 part Vodka

Mixing Directions
Mix together with crushed ice in a glass and garnish with mint leaves

So, until next week, Tweet (FanFicDealer), Message me on Facebook, or email (fanficdealer@gmail.com).

The deal has been made. ;)

::Team Love Shack:: NEW BREAKING DAWN TSHIRTS!!!!!!

2011-04-17T11:39:00.010-04:00

::Team Twilight:: Fan Fiction Friday

2011-04-15T05:00:00.000-04:00

There are times when you feel like you’re starving, but you know you’re not hungry. It’s a craving that burns deeper than the bodies call for nourishment; it’s the soul’s craving for something else and it’s trying to tell you what it needs. So, in those times of need, Lab Tech Andi, has found soul food for your mind and hopefully it’s enough. So head to the blue door, knock the kitchy John Zackerley tune “Dinner with drac" and the password is “Culinary”. Be Safe!

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

“OH MY GOD! WHERE’S THE FIRE EXTINGUSHER?” I heard someone yell over the sound of the alarms that were blaring all around us.

“IT’S UNDER THE SINK, BUT I CAN’T GET OVER THERE!” I heard another yell. I looked over and saw that I had a clear path to the sink, so I rushed over and flung the cabinet door wide. Sitting in plain view was the bright red fire extinguisher. I quickly grabbed it out of the cabinet, raced over to the kitchen island, pulled the pin and squeezed the lever, extinguishing not only Emmett’s attempt at Cherries Jubilee, but the wooden pot rack he had set ablaze when he lit the dish.

“CAN SOMEONE PLEASE TURN OFF THAT ALARM?” I yelled into the smoke that was currently engulfing the kitchen.

“JASPER’S ON IT, BUT I THINK WE SHOULD…” Alice had started yelling beside me when the alarms were suddenly silenced. “…Go outside while the smoke clears.” She finished in a normal voice and took the extinguisher from me.

As I stepped out on the back patio, I could see that most of the Cullen’s and the few authors who had joined me at the main house had all safely made it outside, for which I was thankful. “Is everybody ok?” I asked to the group and I got a few mumbled “yea’s” and “fine’s” as a response. Satisfied that everyone had managed to escape Emmett’s culinary disaster uninjured, I wandered over to a patio chair and plopped down.

Closing my eyes, I leaned back against the chair and thought about how silly this whole thing was. I mean, honestly, why in the world would a bunch of vampires want to have an epic cook-off when they don’t even eat the food?

“Because Emmett loves a competition, and he’s an idiot.” Edward said from the chair beside me; I opened my eyes and rolled my head so that I was looking in his direction. He continued, “He knows that not a single one of these human authors could beat him in a physical challenge, and he could probably think faster than most of them too, but cooking… that’s subjective to the diner’s palette and not something that can be done with speed.”

“But he should have kept it simple instead of trying to prepare something with flare.” Bella added walking over to us and settling herself in Edward’s lap.

“He had flare alright!” He said with a chuckle and wrapped his arms around her.

She looked at him, “kiss”.

He smiled, “Gladly, Love” and moved his face toward hers.

“No Silly!” and she laughed as he pulled away with a slight pout. “K. I. S. S. Keep It Simple Stupid.”

I heard a deep baritone laugh float through the open door and following the sound was Emmett strolling through the door over toward us. “I’m so glad to hear that Bella’s finally come to her senses and realized Edward is stupid.” Edward growled at him, but it only made Emmett’s smile even bigger.

“No Emmett, you’re stupid.” Edward grumbled to him. “Why would you try making a dish that involved fire? For heaven’s sake, even the range in that kitchen is electric, for a very good reason!”

“Emeril made it look so easy, Bro! And everybody loves ice cream or at least that’s what they tell me.” Emmett said with a slight shrug, putting his hands in his pockets. “I guess I put too much brandy in.”

From the side of my vision, I saw a blonde blur coming towards us and grab Emmett. Rosalie stood in front of him silently yanking his hands from his pockets and appeared to be inspecting every inch of him. Once she was satisfied, she smacked the side of his head with her hand and then threw her arms around his neck. “Don’t ever do that again!” she mumbled into his neck. Emmett returned her embrace, holding her tight against him.

Loosening his grip, he leaned back to look her in the eyes, “Don’t ever cook? Or light things on fire?”

She wacked him in the head once more, “Scare me you idiot! Don’t scare me like that!”

She hugged him again, and he mumbled into her hair, “Ok baby, next time I’ll stick to sandwiches.” Finally, Rose gave a little laugh and let him go.

“Well, you may get to display your sandwich making skills very soon because it’s going to take a few hours to get that smoke out.” Alice said joining the rest of us.

“We could do it out here, but instead of making it a big production, let’s just set everything out and people can make their own.” I suggested. “I’ve had enough productions for one day.”

“I’m not so sure that’s a good idea, Andi. It’s going to rain, but we could move this little party to the shack and grab a few movies to show on the flat screen.” Alice countered.

“Ok, that sounds great. I’ll drive the authors back and we’ll meet you there.” I said rising from the chair. Then began the task of corralling everyone in the car.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

So while Emmett has clearly displayed a need for cooking lessons from Edward, I have found a few culinary tales to tempt more than just your taste buds.

My first dish features a succulent appetizer called “Isabella Bites” by GreenPuma. This marvelous recipe has two main ingredients, Isabella Swan, a famous television chef, and Carlisle Cullen, a cosmetic surgeon with a highly honed culinary skill of his own. Throw in an adorable dog named Cujo, a cookbook, a month in Longport, with a dash of Carlisle secret ingredient and you have one incredible romance. I’m not sure if there’s more to this story to come, but it’s an excellent and satisfying one-shot, even if this is all we get.
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/6900305

My next dish is certain to get your taste buds ready and is a wonderful compliment to any meal called “The Baker's Magic Buns” by ciaobella27. This recipe will delight your senses with wonderful aromas and childhood delights as you bite into the plight of the Baker of Storybook Land. Dr. Swan, therapist to the mystical beings of Storybook Land, has been brought in by the Butcher and Candlestick Maker in an attempt to find the Baker a solution to his problem. But I will warn you, this dish tastes incredible, but is a little like Chinese food; you’ll be hungry for more in about an hour, so prepare as often as you dare.
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5314334

My next dish is incredible if you’re looking for a light meal titled “Molto Bella” by ObsessingOverEdward. After spending several years away from the place he grew up, Edward is returning home. He’s paid his dues in the kitchen and even successfully run his own New York restaurant; so now, as a food critic, he’s pretty demanding. However, Edward is completely unprepared when he runs into Bella, an up-and-coming chef in her own restaurant, who could match him step by stubborn step. This is a tale that’s just as savory and simple as the Feta Burger Bella makes in it and as sweet as Bella’s slightly untraditional Tiramisu.
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5278133

Now this dish is bitter sweet and a bit on the heavy side, but every bit delicious called “The Diner” by Jessypt. Bella is a broken woman looking to return to the only safe place she’s known. Without a plan to put her life back together, she manages to find peace in baking her unique cupcakes and waitressing in a small diner in Forks. The staff of this diner is small and family like and willing to do whatever it takes to protect their own. However, will all their efforts be enough to keep Bella safe? Will Edward’s love for her be enough to heal her shattered soul?
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5709380

My final dish is something beautiful called “Wild” by PeppahLouie. After a the very tragic murder of her father and husband, Bella makes the decision to get away from all the small town gossip and move to Seattle to start the life she had been neglecting. Upon moving to the big city, she reaches out to a casual friend, Alice, who along with her brother Edward, owns one of the hottest restaurants in Seattle. What Bella doesn’t know is that Edward has been celibate by choice for 2 years, because his last relationship went to wrong. Will Edward be able to let his guard down and finally trust someone else? Is Bella that person?
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/6655429

So, to go with all these, I’m going to give you the recipe for Cherries Jubilee, but you have to promise that you won’t set your own house on fire.

Ingredients
1 pint vanilla ice cream
1 pound fresh, ripe sweet cherries, such as Bing
1/4 cup dark brown sugar
1/4 cup sugar
1 lemon
1/3 cup cherry brandy

Directions
Evenly scoop the ice cream into 4 dishes or decorative glasses and put in the freezer until ready to serve (this can be done up to 4 hours ahead).

Wash and pit the cherries. Put the cherries and sugar in a large skillet. Peel 2 strips of zest from the lemon in wide strips with a peeler and add to the cherries. Squeeze the juice of half the lemon over the top. Stir to combine evenly. Cover and cook the cherries over medium-low heat until the sugar dissolves, about 4 minutes. Uncover and cook over medium-high until cherries get juicy, about 5 minutes more.

To flambe the brandy: If cooking over a gas flame, pull the pan off the heat and add the rum. Ignite the alcohol with a long match or one held with tongs. Swirl the pan slightly until the flames subside, about 30 seconds.

If cooking over an electric stove, put the brandy in a small sauce pan. Warm it over medium-low heat and carefully light it with a long match or one held with tongs. Pour the lit brandy over the cherries, and swirl the pan lightly until the flames subside, about 30 seconds.

Ladle the cherries and their juices over prepared ice cream scoops. Serve immediately.

So, until next week, Tweet (FanFicDealer), Message me on Facebook, or email (fanficdealer@gmail.com).

The deal has been made. ;)

::Team Twilight:: Fan Fiction Friday

2011-04-08T05:00:00.001-04:00

I knew you’d be back; you just can’t stay away. I’ve got your brand of addiction right here and you want to know what’s in it, don’t ya? Well, now I can’t give away all my secrets, but I will tell you Lab Tech Andi is full is mysteries this week and there’s a crime in the lab. Of course, if you really need somethin’, tread carefully to the blue door behind the shack and knock the melody of Reba McEntire’s “The Night The Lights Went Out In Georgia” and you’ll need to know that the password is “Clue”. Be Safe!

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

It was an unusually dark and stormy morning and if it weren't for the forest, the wind would have had the strength to blow someone into the next state. So without any hesitation, I rushed in the lab, quickly closing the door behind me. Only after I flicked the light switch and remained in complete blackness did I become acutely aware that the only sound in the entire lab was the rain dripping off my coat and my own breathing.

“Hello?” I shouted into the darkness walking further into the room. That’s when I noticed a slender figure wrapped in the dark trench coat standing by the window. I jumped back in surprise; hands flying to my heart which was now nearly trying to beating its way out of my body.

“I'm so sorry, Andi! I didn't mean to scare you,” I heard the familiar voice cooed and I let out my breath in a big gust as I realized it was only Esme.

“What’s going on? And where is everybody?” I asked walking toward her. Since she could see perfectly, she met me half way and wrapped her hand around my arm.

“The wind knocked the power out, so we took all the authors to the main house. It has backup generators, so they could keep working.” She explained, but continued to hold me close to her side. “However, there’s something not right in here. I could smell it when I came to pick them all up, but I didn’t want to frighten anyone so I didn’t say anything. Once I got them settled, I came back to check it out.”

I uselessly scanned the darkness, while Esme guided me through the room. “I think there’s a camping lantern in the closet. If we get that, I’ll finally be able to see.” I told her. Once we reached the closet, I heard her hand turn the door knob and then I was yanked backwards, knocking the breath out of me as I heard the thud of something hitting the floor.

“What the hell was that?” I asked catching my breath again. Esme gasped. A bright light was suddenly shining in our direction.

“It’s a body.” I heard another familiar voice say. Carlisle handed me a flashlight.

“Oh my God! It’s not one of my authors, is it?” I moved to rush toward the body that was now covered by a sheet, but Esme held me where we were.

“No Andi! It’s not one of the authors,” Carlisle said. “It’s not anyone we know.” He told me, I’m sure to try and calm me, but the adrenaline running through my veins continued to make my heart beat faster. “Jasper, can you please help her?” I felt a cool hand slip into my own and my heart slowed, however the excess adrenaline made me feel exhausted. As my legs started to buckle under me, Jasper swept me up and carried me over to a chair and Alice came over.

“How could you not see this, Alice? Humans don’t get murdered in my lab! How can I ask them to come here on Fridays, if there’s danger around?” I asked looking at her; she wrapped her tiny arms around me.

“I don’t know why I didn’t see; something is blocking me, but we’ll figure this out, I promise.” Alice said with conviction.

I shone the flashlight at the body and saw that Carlisle was examining the body. “That’s so odd. There are all these tiny puncture wounds in the body and there’s dirt everywhere.”

“Emmett and I scanned the forest just outside the shack and we didn’t find anything.” Edward said as he and Emmett walked in.

“No, I don’t suppose you would. Edward come here and smell this,” Carlisle said waving his over. “What do you smell? It’s familiar, isn’t it?”

Edward’s eyes widened slightly, “Hummingbird Mints!” Then he looked at Esme.

I glanced between the both of them, confused. Esme glared back at him “Edward! I did not kill a human in my garden and bring them here! What would be my reasoning?”

“I don’t know Esme, but you’re the only person in the entire state who can manage to get Hummingbird mints to thrive in this zone and you were the first person here, so you tell me?”

I launched myself out of the chair and put myself between them. “Now wait just one minute!” I said to the both of them and then turned my full attention to Edward. “I’m sure you can see in her mind that Esme did not kill this person.”

“Actually, I can’t because she’s blocking me.” Edward growled.

“Then there has to be a clue in Esme’s garden,” I proclaimed. “Why don’t you go check it out?”

“Fine, but we’ll figure out if you’re hiding anything.” Edward said glaring directly at Esme, then flew out the door.

“Thank you for trusting me” Esme said to me guiding me back to the chair.

“Well, according to Charlie, there aren’t any new missing person reports.” Bella said strolling into the room.

“And all the bodies in the hospital morgue are all accounted for.” Rosalie announced as she walked through the door. Now I was really confused, why would Rose be checking the morgue?
Jasper sensed my confusion and whispered in my ear, “Just in case the death happened at the hospital and the body didn’t make it to the morgue.” I nodded and mouthed a silent ‘oh’.

Edward burst back through the door and raced to stand in front of Alice. “Care to explain why your price tagging gun was in the garden?”

“I know you’re not trying to say that I killed a human in Esme’s garden.”

“Well, you didn’t trying to prevent it, so what else are we to assume?”

“Watch it Edward,” Alice hissed back at him, “you know what happens when you assume.” Emmett stifled a giggled in the corner. Alice continued, “Besides, I loaned that tagging gun to Charlie for his yard sale.”

All at once, every eye in the room turned to Bella. I could hear several people in the room declare a quiet ‘NO’. Bella lifted her head, and then moved to flee, but Edward caught her. He put his face to her hair and inhaled deeply, taking in the faint scent of Hummingbird mints.

“So, Bella killed a human in Esme’s garden with Alice’s tagging gun?” I asked quite confused as to why she would go to all the trouble when she could have simply done it with her hands. “And how did Alice not see that?”

“Oh Bella! You had Renesmee with you didn’t you?” Alice asked with slight excitement. Now I was really confused, why would Alice be excited?

“I think it’s time to fill Andi in. Her confusion is getting worse with each passing discovery.” Jasper stated to the group.

“Why don’t you come see the body?” Carlisle said gesturing me over.

“I don’t want to see any dead body!”

“It’ll be fine, trust me,” Esme took my arm and walked me over to where Carlisle was. He pulled the sheet back and I slammed my eyes shut. Esme squeezed my hand, “Open your eyes honey.” I gasped when the body that lay beneath the sheet was a Rescue Annie doll.

“Wait! I don’t understand, I thought there was a real person here, what’s going on?” I asked, looking at all of them.

Emmett walked over to take my arm and guide me back to the chair, “When the weather’s bad, it’s boring to be stuck inside with nothing to do and board games are just too easy, so a few years ago we decided to play a game of Clue Cullen style.” Emmett grinned as he explained and set me back in my seat.

“Each of us has a designated item and a place; the entire town is our game board and the CPR dummy is our victim.” Alice said placing a hand on my shoulder.

“Damn! That sounds so fun, but you scared the hell out of me!” I scowled at them.

Emmett lowered himself to eye level with me, “Sorry we scared you, but it was great playing the game with a witness!” His smile was huge and I couldn’t keep myself smiling back at him. “So, are you up for another game?”

“Sure, but at least I won’t be afraid this time.” I said standing again and the lights flickered to life.

“Cool, let’s get the cards and Renesmee so we can pick our next murderer!” Rose called.

And without warning the lights flickered back out again.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

So, while the Cullen’s another game of Clue Fork’s Edition, here are a few other mysteries that you might like:

My first mystery was found in the streets of Paris in a tale called “Girl with a Red Umbrella” by spanglemaker9 and justaskalice. The year is 1950 and Rosalie Hale is missing. After her last living relative passes away, Rosalie decides to leave everything behind and head to Paris to study, but when she vanishes without a trace, her best friend, Bella, comes to find her. Following a trail of clues left behind by Rose's letters, Bella teams up with Rose’s Paris roommate and an assortment of other characters in her search for Rose. But what she finds might be more than she was looking for.
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5421617

My next mystery was found in an awesome little story called “Bedroom Confessions” by JandMsMommy. At 24, detective Edward Cullen has found himself investigating the perfect murder. Unfortunately, there’s only one witness and she can’t remember anything nor can she stay where she was before. So Edward takes it upon himself to protect this only witness's identity from the murderer. But can he control his feelings for her, and can he handle the secrets she hides?
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5651876

My last little mystery is perfectly titled “Sweeter Than Anything” by unicornhime. Edward and Jasper are the proprietors of a perfume shop where they are always searching for the perfect scents. Their shop philosophy is that beauty should be shared with the world and all of their custom scents are renowned. But more than anything, what makes these perfumes precious is the secret ingredient that either man would take to the grave. Fair warning, this is a very dark mystery and not for the faint at heart.
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5875879

So, as with any crime mystery, the only thing suitable to pair them with would be a Martini, but I prefer mine sweet.

Ingredients
2 ½ oz Gin
½ oz Sweet Vermouth
1 twist of Lemon peel

Mixing instructions
In a mixing glass half-filled with ice cubes, combine the gin and vermouth. Stir well. Strain into a cocktail glass. Garnish with the lemon twist.

You know, I'm thinking about creating the cards and a game board for Clue Cullen Love Shack Edition so that you can download it. If this is something you really want, Tweet (FanFicDealer), Message me on Facebook, or email (fanficdealer@gmail.com).

The deal has been made. ;)

:: Team Twilight :: The Official Illustrated Guide

2011-04-04T10:31:00.000-04:00

Morning Shackers! Guess what's being released next week! An "Official" guide to our beloved series, written by our queen Meyer herself!

According to Barnes & Nobles website, where you can pre order you copy, Meyer gives us a look into the world of Twilight that she created!

"This must-have hardcover edition--the only official guide--is the definitive encyclopedic reference to the Twilight Saga and provides readers with everything they need to further explore the unforgettable world Stephenie Meyer created in Twilight, New Moon, Eclipse, Breaking Dawn, and The Short Second Life of Bree Tanner. This comprehensive handbook–essential for every Twilight Saga fan–is full-color throughout with nearly 100 gorgeous illustrations and photographs and with exclusive new material, character profiles, genealogical charts, maps, extensive cross-references, and much more."

The book hits store shelves April 12th, next Tuesday!!


Source: Amazon.com

This is ONE book no Twilighter should be without!!!

Sources: Amazon.com and Barnes & Nobles.com

::Team Twilight:: Fan Fiction Friday

2011-04-01T06:06:00.003-04:00

Who else dreamt of sweaty island nights with a vegetarian vampire holding onto a headboard in a blue room? Well, if you’re craving something a little sultry to go with all those images, Lab Tech Andi has put together another smut-tastic dirty dozen in an attempt to keep you satisfied. So head to the blue door at the back of the shack, hit to smooth beat of John Mayer’s “Come Back to Bed” and the password is “Headboard”. Be Safe!

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

“Dang, Rose! Are you trying to kill me?” every limb hurt and I felt like I’d been beaten. It was Thursday afternoon and Rosalie had decided that I sit too much and needed more exercise. So after I’d eaten my lunch she dragged me out to a personally tailored extreme Pilate’s class.

“Oh, you’ll be fine. A few of my classes and you’ll be in the best shape of your life.” She said as we were walking into the lab and I was putting my workout clothes in the closet.

“I’ll get stronger or you’ll kill me.” I responded with a laugh and then walked over to my desk to flip on the computer. Without warning, Alice raced through the door, Emmett and Carlisle following close behind.

“Andi! Step away from that computer!” Alice shouted as she went to shut off my monitor. “Whew! That was close.” She laughed and slumped down on some pillows on the other side of the room.

“What’s going on, Alice? Is it another one of those viral internet things?” I asked and I felt my phone vibrate in my pocket.

“Not the same thing as last time, but sort of. It’s not good for your health to be seeing such thing right now anyway,” she told me as I pulled out my phone and unlocked it. Immediately, I was assaulted with the images of a muscular back, strong arms, and nimble finger gripping a wooden headboard. My vision started to faded, my breathing was ragged and shallow and I could faintly hear Alice’s voice as if under water saying, “Why on earth didn’t I think to take away her cell phone! Damn Twitter!” and then I was falling.

When I eventually came out of my stupor, my head was in Alice’s lap and she was combing through my hair, “What happened?”

“Someone leaked a few pictures from that breaking dawn movie and when you pulled one up you passed out.”

I looked up at her in confusion, “I don’t understand. Why would a picture make me pass out?”

“Don’t you remember the picture at all?” she asked. “Oh never mind! You’ll be able to look at them tomorrow, but you need rest now.”

“Can I have my phone back?”

“Tomorrow, now sleep.” She commanded and I closed my eyes and dreamed erotic dreams of headboards and topaz eyes.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Now, I know I’m not the only one who dreamt dreams of headboards and since those dreams aren’t on paper, my deals this week are something that are just as smutty as most of our dreams.

1. Mutual Assent by cdunbar – Bella has had a crush on her optometrist for years, and it’s perfectly normal to have your eyes checked twice a year right?
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/4953680

2. One Night by butterflybetty – Emmett walks into the bar and as his eyes scan the room, he sees the most beautiful woman sitting at the bar. He just knows he has to have her, do you think it’ll be a problem that she’s married?
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/6059922

3. The Love of a Pirate by muggleinlove – Bella, once the proper daughter is a Governor, now stands on the rocky cliffs of Twilight Cay constantly awaiting the arrival of her one true love, Pirate Captain Edward.
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/4494785

4. Rebel Without a Cause by Amethyst Jackson - Days before her wedding, Bella decides to go for one last motorcycle ride while Edward is in Seattle getting a final fitting on his tux. To put it mildly, Edward is NOT pleased and takes out is irritation with her the only way he knows how.
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/4612080

5. Just This Once by lexiecullen17 – It’s the day after graduation and Bella still hasn’t lost her virginity, but she told her best friend Jasper she wants it to be Edward. Things get very strange when Jasper offers to strip her of this awkward burden, in front of Edward. Was it just making light of the situation or does Jasper have secrets of his own?
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5362094

6. Stupid, stupid Bella by Signature.Hot.Chocolate – Bella just can seem to say no to those adrenaline inducing activities, but Edward may be able to talk her into giving up her reckless behavior.
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/4151152

7. Trust by three.hills – Bella’s human clumsiness amuses Edward a great deal when she manages to trip and lands in the pool. But Bella’s not willing to be the comic relief and turns this into an opportunity for seduction.
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/4309364

8. Fifty Cents A Ride by Daddy's Little Cannibal – It’s time for a lesson in laundry; step 1 – Put in clothes; step 2 – measure detergent; step 3 – set cycle; step 4 – thank the very nice woman who was helping you.
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/4379202

9. Pianists by Rosette-Cullen – While waiting for Edward to pick her up at the treaty line, Jacob and Bella entertain themselves by making jokes about Edward’s possible bedroom skills. But Edward’s going to make a point about what pianists hands are really capable of.
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/4581508

10. Night in Nantes by enamors – Bella, gets talked into attending a frat party by the only friend she really has, so imagine her surprise when she find her soul mate while lying in the middle of the street.
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/4777515

11. In Your Eyes by 107yearoldvirgin - Bella Swan and Edward Cullen are starring in the remake of Say Anything. Their attraction is obvious. Where will their chemistry come from during the pivotal backseat sex scene?
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/6745014

12. Collection by k8ella - Bella Swan is a teacher for the school where the mysterious Mr. Cullen was once a student. She so desperately wants to meet him, but doesn’t figure he’d have any interest in someone like her, little does she realize how very little she knows about this man and his hobbies.
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/6422319

As for something to go along with these fics, I think you’ll need something to sip and a “Smooth Pink Lemonade” will do the trick.

Ingredients
1 ½ oz Vodka
1 part Cranberry Juice
1 part Sour Mix
1 part 7-up

Mixing Instructions
Stir in a glass with ice and enjoy!

Be sure to keep your eyes open for other excitement this weekend, I'm sure it'll be on the horizon, Tweet (FanFicDealer), Message me on Facebook, or email (fanficdealer@gmail.com) if you want to talk shop.

The deal has been made. ;)

Some Convention infromation for the next couple conventions in Connecticut and Virginia ~Summe

2011-03-31T00:55:00.001-04:00

TWILIGHT CONVENTIONS: VIRGINIA & CONNECTICUT THIS SPRING!
Celebrate The Twilight Saga at the next two Official TWILIGHT Convention Tour stops: April 15-17, 2011 in Arlington, Virginia and May 14-15, 2011 for our first stop in Hartford, Connecticut. We have two fantastic gatherings planned filled with great Twilight celebrities, special exclusive events, parties, music, autographing, photo ops, contests, videos, panels, lots of fellow fans and much more!

Arlington boasts on-stage appearances by Wolf Pack members Chaske Spencer, Bronson Pelletier, Julia Jones, and Gil Birmingham as well as Charlie Bewley, Demetri of The Volturi and Patrick Brennan, Liam of the Irish Vampire Coven in The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn. Also on hand in his first tour appearance Bill Tangradi who plays Randall, the nomad vampire in The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn Parts 1 and 2. One more guest is to be announced.

The Official TWILIGHT Convention Tour comes to Hartford with Peter Facinelli (Dr. Carlisle Cullen) joined by Wolf Pack members Bronson Pelletier, Tinsel Korey, Tyson Houseman and Booboo Stewart.

The summer will bring stops to Parsippany, New Jersey (July 29-31) where we've just added Peter Facinelli (Dr. Carlisle Cullen), Boston (August 19-21), and Cincinnati (first visit, August 27-28).

::Team Twilight:: Fan Fiction Friday

2011-03-25T05:00:00.000-04:00

The human brain is a miraculous organ, it processes so much information all at once and when you digest the written word, it makes your body react without a single stimulus. Words can give you goose bumps without the whisper of a breeze, make your pulse quicken at the mere thought of a kiss, and make you exhausted when you haven’t moved any inch. However, the fandom inspires more than just the written word and although I would never deprive you of your literary addiction, this week you’ll have to open your eyes and take in other beautiful pieces of the fandom. So, purchase you ticket in advance then head to the blue door behind the shack, knock the funky rhythm of “Video Killed the Radio Star” and the password is “Roll ‘em”. Be Safe!

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

How in the hell does she do this every week? I thought to myself as I silently tried to sift through the files before me. There were like a zillion files on here; over a 178,000 on just one site alone. How does she ever find anything?

I glanced over to where Rosalie was braiding Andi’s hair into an insanely intricate pattern; Rose looked over to me and smiled. I was so going to owe her tonight and she knew it. I’m sure you’re just a little confused, so let me explain.

Earlier in the week, Rose, Alice, and I were out hunting when Alice started going on and on about some stories she’d found that she was going to mention to Andi. I just smiled and nodded in the appropriate places.

Then when we got back to the house, Bella ran up to Alice and started jabbering on about one of our previous authors getting published. Eventually, that conversation drifted to a different room and I tuned it out.

After a while, all those things started to eat away at me just a little; Alice and Bella were both finding authors for the lab these days, and sure Andi had given me some Emmett days, but she’d never actually let me recommend anything. Probably because I’d recommend something like “The Cullen’s go to Wal-Mart”; she probably wasn’t far off, Wal-Mart is a freakin’ hilarious place to be.

So, anyway, I talked to Rose, who is the master of diversion, and explained that I wanted to hijack Andi’s post for Friday. She just rolled her eyes at me, but agreed to help. Ultimately, that’s how I found myself now looking at over a hundred billion words trying to figure out which ones to recommend. Rose knows I’m not much of a reader, which is probably why she gave me the look, suspecting I’d lost my mind for wanting such a thing, but damn it, I wanted my turn.

My fingers moved swiftly and silently over the keys, but then I heard her; knowing I’d been caught.

“Emmett, I know what you’re doing.” Andi said all the way from the other side of the room.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about, I’m not doing anything.” I answered in a cool tone.

“You’ve been staring at my computer the entire time Rose has been doing my hair. If you not looking for stories, what else would you be looking for, porn?” then she laughed at her little joke.

I just scowled in her direction. “No.”

“Well, I suspect you’re over thinking it. Just like all of you inspire stories, occasionally those stories inspire other things, like pictures, songs, or videos.” She explained.

“Videos? Really?” I was excited now, I understood videos.

“Sure, just look on YouTube and see what peaks your interest.” Then she closed her eyes while Rose continued braiding.

“Sweet!” I typed in the web address and pressed enter.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Now this was truly a scavenger hunt, but I found some excellent fics with videos and since I can’t write a summary like Andi can, I’m going to let the video do it for me. I hope you like and I know I’ve beat Bella and Alice, just by sheer number this time. Ha! Ha! Ha!

The Red Line by WinndSinger
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/4819806

video by JustBiel1

Sub Plans by SnowWhiteHearts
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5894804

video by bellabee66

Fade into you by RCD_Alice
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/6014591

Video by HermioneFan01

Sleepers, Awake: Wachet auf, ruft uns die Stimme By Feisty Y. Beden
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5118949

Video by WideAwakeRehab

The Best man by Bratty-Vamp
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5122163

video by Alitriona

Dark Side of the Moon by blondie AKA robin
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/4273193

video by xEternallyDazzledx

And since this was a drink created just for me, I think everyone should have an “Irritable Grizzly”

½ oz Cinnamon Schnapps
1 oz Raspberry Vodka
6-8 oz Ginger Ale
Splash of Rose’s Grenadine for color

Pour everything into a collins glass. Stir gently. Fill with ice and garnish with a cherry.

So, until next week, if you're part of the reading challenge, be sure to log the chapters you've reviewed for the Million Word Reading Challenge (Andi's been a little busy lately, but she'll get caught up soon.), Tweet (FanFicDealer), Message me on Facebook, or email (fanficdealer@gmail.com) if you want to talk shop.

The deal has been made. ;)

:: Team Roboswki :: Rob lands on another cover of Entertainment Weekly

2011-03-24T11:32:00.000-04:00

As you guys know, Water For Elephants, will be released into theaters on April 22! And now, Rob has landed another cover of Entertainment Weekly with the beautiful Resee Witherspoon. He talks of Water for Elephants and Breaking Dawn, stating that the one thing he will NOT miss are the contacts that he has to wear, and where his career might lead after Breaking Dawn is completed.

Check out the magazine on newstands tomorrow!

Isn't he just HOT!

Source: http://popwatch.ew.com/2011/03/24/this-weeks-cover-robert-pattinson-beyond-twilight

::Team Twilight:: Fan Fiction Friday

2011-03-18T05:37:00.006-04:00

I had a dream last night and all of you were in it. We were back in school, and there was supposed to be a test. I was nervous, because I was afraid I didn’t know any of the answers, but then when I saw the first question, I smiled. All the questions were about my favorite fics so I breezed right through. After the test was over, I stepped into the hall and was caught off guard by the sight of Rob. Then, I noticed he wasn’t wearing a shirt and just before my eyes glanced down to his hips I woke up. Now, I know you hate being awakened during such a good dream, so Lab Tech Andi has found some drool-worthy geeks to give you all something good to see when you close your eyes. Just head to the blue door at the back of the shack, knock the geeky beats of "Grade 9" by Barenaked Ladies and give the password “Nerdward”. Be Safe!

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

After spending so much time traveling, it was nice to finally be back in the lab. Almost relaxing to come back to the humdrum of everyday activities. Of course, now that we had returned, we had a lot of catching up to do.

Bella and Edward had class work to catch up on and thankfully they were able to complete most of their assignments online; it was one of the few benefits of online universities. However, even with the aid of perfect recall, it only made it easier to do the work, and this was Bella’s first time through. So, while she put together a paper about ‘Romanticism in the New Testament of the Bible’, Edward was using his time to teach Renesmee geometry.

“Okay, Nessie, here’s the next problem: Using only elementary geometry, determine angle x. Provide a step-by-step proof.

“You may use only elementary geometry, such as the fact that the angles of a triangle add up to 180 degrees and the basic congruent triangle rules (side-angle-side, etc.). You may not use trigonometry, such as sines and cosines, the law of sines, the law of cosines, etc.”

Renesmee stared at the diagram for only a couple minutes then turned to her father and proudly announced, “It’s 20, Daddy!”

Bella and I glanced at each other and giggled. Edward shot a brief glare at us and then turned back to his daughter. “How did you come to that result? Part of the instructions stated you need to prove your work.” Renesmee frowned.

“But I was right, wasn’t I?” she asked.

“That’s not the point, Sweetheart; you need to complete all the steps to solve the problem so that people don’t doubt your answer.”

However, instead of picking up a pencil and paper, she placed her tiny hand on his cheek and stared into his face. They sat as still as stone for several minutes and I whispered under my breath, “Damn, I so wish I could read minds right now.”

“So, do I,” Bella replied as we watched a slight grin wash across Edward’s face.

“Nessie, if it’s not on paper, no one else can see your work,” I heard Edward explain to her.

“If someone really wanted to see my work, I’ll just show them like I showed you. Besides, Daddy my method helps to save the environment, don’t you want to be green?” she responded quite satisfied with herself.

Bella and I burst into fit of laughter while Edward just rolled his eyes. “Oh, believe me sweetheart, I’ve been green for a very long time. Now, let’s just move on to the next problem, shall we?”

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Oh how I’ve missed our nerdward, he really is so entertaining. So this week, I’m bringing him back with all my deals. Enjoy!

My first amazing little tale is everything we need right after our Irish holiday, titled “Green” by Bratty-Vamp. Bella Swan is rich, beautiful, and popular. Her father is a very successful plastic surgeon which affords her the luxury of living in a beautiful house that other people take care of. One of those, so-called, caretakers just happens to be none other than Edward Cullen, aka the lawn boy. As for Edward, he’s managed to stay pretty invisible his whole life; just saving for college to get out of this small town. However, when Bella nearly drowns in her own pool and Edward rushes in to save her, both of their bizarre worlds are about to be turned on their sides. This story could be defined as a slightly reverse twilight, but the characters are wonderfully developed and unique enough to make you love these versions just as much as the original.
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/6108912

My next geekward was hiding in a kissing booth, in a one-shot tale called “Twenty Tickets” by JK5959. Edward thinks he’s a geek that no girl in their right mind would want to be with, but in all honesty, there’s only one girl he’d want to be with anyway, Bella. Unfortunately, the only time he ever really spends time with her is in Biology class. So, when Edward is told that, he’ll be helping his tennis team raise money for new uniforms by participating in a kissing booth during the school carnival, he’s just positive that this will be one lonely night. Edward might be very surprised by who appears during his shift. This is an adorable story and so well thought out. I know you’ll love it too.
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/4748537

My third little nerdward was discovered in a more grow-up tale called “Discovering You, Discovering Me” by JSFazz. In high school, Edward Cullen was branded a geek and bullied every single day. Bella Swan honestly didn’t fare much better with her awkwardness and never quite fitting in to any group. However, they were too shy to really know each other well back then, so when they bump into each other years later and Bella is in need of a job, Edward hires her on to work in the pharmacy with him. Will they be able to let go of their insecurities and discover their hidden potential?
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5705894

Now, because you’ve just gotten over St. Patty’s day, who says it has to end, you have all weekend, so grab a fic and a Guinness.

Stay safe and until next week. If you're part of my challenge, be sure to log the chapters you've reviewed for the Million Word Reading Challenge (I've released part of the fic I was challenged to write, you can find it under the title "In Nature"), Tweet (FanFicDealer), Message me on Facebook, or email (fanficdealer@gmail.com) if you want to talk shop.

The deal has been made. ;)

For those going to the Nashville Convention there has been a line up change due to filming :) ~Summer

2011-03-11T13:13:00.001-05:00

TWILIGHT NASHVILLE:
OFFICIAL TOUR STOP THIS WEEKEND: MAJOR UPDATE!
The Official TWILIGHT Convention returns to the great city of NASHVILLE this weekend (March 11-13, 2011) and you are invited to join the celebration! Due to filming of The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn Parts 1 & 2 there have been a number of changes to our guest list.

We have a wonderful weekend planned now headlined by Nikki Reed (Rosalie Hale), Gil Birmingham (Billy Black), Charlie Bewley (Demetri of The Volturi), Leah Gibson (Nettie in The Twilight Saga: Eclipse), Jodelle Ferland (Bree Tanner of The Twilight Saga: Eclipse), Patrick Brennan (Liam from The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn Part 2), and Guri Weinberg (Romanian Coven Vampire Stefan from The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn Part 1 & 2.

Click through to www.twilightconvention.com for full details and the complete schedule of events.

For those of you that have separate autograph and/or photo op tickets for guests that were unable to make it please bring your tickets to registration and we will exchange it for a voucher with which you can purchase other tickets or merchandise or send back to us for a refund (up to one month after the convention).

TICKETS are available at the door: come on down for the fun!

::Team Twilight:: Fan Fiction Friday

2011-03-11T05:17:00.009-05:00

I know you’re beggin’ for a bite, just a little taste, he’s just so dang scrumptious, you begin to salivate at the mere sight of him. And the trouble is he really thinks he’s scary, but he’s just too adorable to frighten anyone. Don’t tell him that though. I know a lot of you may think I’m talking about Edward here, but I don’t care what team you’re on, everyone craves a little bit of Emmett from time to time. So, just for Kellan’s birthday, you should head to the blue door, knock the beat of “Rhythm of Love” by the Plain White T's and the password is “Emmett”. Be Safe!

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Travelers hurried around the airport terminal in a flurry of chaos. It was early and I was tired; happy, but tired. In a town that spent so much time partying the night before, I was amazed that this many people were functioning. I glanced around again; maybe functioning was the wrong term. Only about a quarter of this crowd could actually be classified as functioning, most of them looked hung over or perhaps even still drunk. The rest looked like the walking dead; the Cullen’s didn’t stand out in any way.

Reflecting on our trip, we’d had a lot of fun in New Orleans and after the incident with the voodoo shop owner, we tried very hard to not scare anyone else. However, as we got closer and closer to Mardi Gras, it appeared that the general public got drunker and drunker which also meant that they stopped paying much attention to us altogether. Rosalie had the best time throwing beads and Edward managed to talk his way into jamming with a local jazz band. It was awesome to see him on stage and it was easy to see how happy it made Bella to hear him; like he had the whole band playing just for her. It made my heart melt.

But right now, I was sitting at gate C36 playing spades with Edward, Bella, and Jasper. Bella was protecting our thoughts so Edward couldn’t cheat and Jasper was keeping me calm so that I was not at a human disadvantage. It was entertaining and currently Bella and I were winning 5 games to the boys 2 games. I wasn’t sure where Alice and Emmett had run off to and Rosalie, Jacob, and Renesmee were all browsing a car magazine, feverishly debating the benefits of a particular brand of spark plug, I think.

I looked up at the board for the gate again, “Las Vegas, NV” scrolled across the LED panel. When I reviewed our itinerary last night I could have sworn we were connecting through Denver, but the gate Alice sent us to had yet to indicate a Denver flight and although I was slightly confused, I was too exhausted to put up a fight. I was simply along for the ride. So I played my hand.

“Way to go, Andi!” Bella exclaimed raising her hand for a high five, I smacked her hand. “That makes us 6 to 2! Want to play again?”

“Why bother?” Edward shrugged. “You and Andi are killing us.”

“Afraid you’ll lose again?” she taunted back.

“Honestly? Yes.” He laughed as he answered her. She smiled back at him and kissed him lightly. Then she turned back to me, “so, got anything new to read?”

“Oh, I have some excellent things to read,” I smiled at her and reached into my bag for my netbook. “Give me your Kindle and I’ll load them.” She handed it over and once my machine was up and running, I plugged it in and started transferring files.

I was scrolling through my directories, when a balled up piece of paper hit me in the back of the head. I picked it up and turned around, but nothing was there. I turned back to my computer. Another ball of paper hit me and I turned again, but saw no one. I rolled my eyes and faced my computer again. A third ball of paper hit me and I spun in my seat, “Emmett!” I growled under my breath.

“What?” he answered from the seat beside me that was previously empty.

“Stop.” I told him simply.

“Stop what?” he asked feigning innocence, but smiling at me.

“Stop hitting me with paper.” I stated and turned back to my screen. “Where did you and Alice go anyway?”

“We had to go change our flights to the one to Vegas.” He sat back in the seat as though this was the most normal thing in the world.

“Why are we going through Vegas? Was Denver not a good place to change planes?”

“Oh, I’m sure Denver would have been fine, but we’re going to crash a birthday party.”

“We are?” I was now intrigued and he knew it. “Who’s birthday party?”

“My doppelganger, Kellan Lutz, is having a birthday party at club Pure in Vegas and we’re going to crash it.” Emmett stated smiling so wide, it appeared as though his face might split in two.

“Awesome!” I responded unplugging Bella’s Kindle. “Here Bella, I’m done.” As I leaned across the space to hand it back to her, I felt another ball of paper hit me in the head.

I turned to face him, “Why do you keep doing that?”

“I’m bored and you’re funny” he chuckled.

“I’ll make a deal with you, if you stop throwing paper at me, I’ll make sure all my stories this week feature you, in honor of Kellan’s birthday. Deal?”

“Sweet! Deal!” he answered, but continued to play with the paper in his hands.

“But if you hit me with anymore paper the deal is off, got it?” I sat back with my netbook and plugged in my wireless modem.

“Fine.” He said with a pout on his face.

“Now go away, Babe, you’re bothering me.” I told him patting his leg and smiling at him. Then he patted my head and I heard him say, “Oh Rosie!” just before he walked away from me.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Now, I don’t have a clue what he and Rose may have done at the airport, but he didn’t come back to bother me, so I’m keeping my promise and boy did I find some deals for you. I hope these fulfill all your Emmett fantasies.

My first drool worthy Emmett tale is titled, “The Ice Queen and Mister McCarty” by SebastienRobichaud. Emmett McCarty is a partner attorney for Smithson and Sons and he’s very good at what he does. It’s just unfortunate that his office is right beside the water cooler and he’s subjected to much more gossip than he’d like. Of course, being a highly intelligent, former college athlete, Emmett is intimately aware that things are not always as they appear. So when he’s caught defending the honor of the office “Ice Queen”, he becomes even more aware that there’s something she’s hiding under this cold armor she’s wrapped around herself. Will his warm personality and gentle nature, be enough to thaw her so that she can finally be herself again? This is an excellent story from an amazing author, so I know you’ll enjoy it.
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/6528047

My next Emmett tale is a tad of a puzzle called “Down & Across” by hmonster4 and TheHeartoflife. Emmett McCarty used to be a big time technology executive, but knew that was never the life for him. Rosalie Hale thought she was well on her way to achieving her dreams, successful career, husband, and friends, but deep down she wanted more, she knew there was more. Two lost souls reaching out, trying to spell out that what the heart desires. Can two people look passed their complex pasts and find something amazing in the simple pleasures of a coastal town? This tale is very light hearted, but the journey is worth it.
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5967086

My next deal is a collection of one shots called, “30 days of Emmett” by 30 Days of Emmett. This is 5 weeks of little randomness, outtakes, and one-shots from more than 70 authors, all devoted to the big guy with the dimples. It includes all different ratings, all pairings, all universes and genres. For true variety, this is a fun read.
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/6476118

Finally, I’m offering up a hot story called, “Heavy in Your Arms” by sadtomato. Bella dated Edward in High School and she thought things were amazing with him until things just weren’t. Something was off about their relationship and even though she couldn’t quite identify what it was, she trusted him enough to let him be her first. But Edward was harboring a secret that he wasn’t even willing to admit to himself, which left Bella feeling worthless and broken. A year later, she runs into Emmett, Edward’s older brother, at a party and learns the truth about Edward. Can the truth about Emmett’s feelings help her heal and learn to be appreciated? Can she learn to forgive herself?
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/6109126

Now, because its Kellan’s birthday and he never got back to me on twitter as to whether he preferred cake or pie, I’m going to go with an Emmett preference. In breaking dawn, Emmett and Jasper were contemplating the hunting possibilities in the Amazon, one of which were jaguars, so I’m suggesting something better than cake, called “Jaguar Bars”

Ingredients
1 cup Butter
1 cup firmly packed brown sugar
1/2 cup sugar
2 eggs
1 teaspoon vanilla
2 1/2 cup all-purpose flour
1 teaspoon Baking soda
1 teaspoon ground Cinnamon
1/2 teaspoon salt
2 cups chopped dates
1 cup chopped Walnuts

vanilla glaze
2 cups powdered sugar
1/2 teaspoon vanilla
1/4 cup Milk

Instructions
Soften butter, blend with sugars and eggs until mixture is fluffy, Stir in vanilla and dates. Let stand for 5 minutes to soften dates. Add salt, cinnamon, and soda; mix well. Add flour and blend until all dry ingredients are moist. Stir in nuts.

Spread into an 11" x 17" cookie sheet pan with sides. Bake at 325 for 25-30 minutes. Cool completely then cut into 2.5" x 3" rectangles.

Mix glaze until all sugar is dissolved and smooth. Drizzle over bars and allow to dry completely (usually overnight, so you'll want to cover with paper towels or another cookie sheet of equal size) before removing from pan.

Well, we'll get back to the Shack someday, but until next week. If you're part of my challenge, be sure to log the chapters you've reviewed for the Million Word Reading Challenge (I've released part of the fic I was challenged to write, you can find it under the title "In Nature"), Tweet (FanFicDealer), Message me on Facebook, or email (fanficdealer@gmail.com) if you want to talk shop.

The deal has been made. ;)

::Team Jasper:: 100 Monkey's Official Novel Available for Pre-Order

2011-03-09T21:48:00.004-05:00

Since, I'm seriously addicted to anything of a literary nature, I'm going to fill you in on this little tidbit: 100 Monkeys claims that they have written a book!!

Now before you start screaming "OMG!OMG!OMG!", take a deep breath while I tell you a few of the details, so you can judge for yourself:

The release date is April 1st.

Nowhere on their official website does it say what the book is about.

You can pre-order a signed copy for $40 and an unsigned copy for $10.

They have created a commercial for the book, which still doesn't reveal what the book is about.

The book in the commercial looks like a bound library book with a sticker on it.

It could be fiction or non-fiction, your guess is as good as mine.

So, here's where I'm going with this; given the date of publication, is this real? Or simply an elaborately planned April Fools joke?

Here's a link to the sale of the book if you're willing to take the risk.
http://www.100monkeysmusic.com/monkeymart

You tell me. ;)

::Team Twilight:: Fan Fiction Friday

2011-03-04T05:00:00.002-05:00

I know what you’re thinking, “It’s Friday and you’re ready to party.” Well, keep your shirts on and while we don’t have beads to throw at ya, Lab Tech Andi has been scouring the Big Easy looking for fics worthy to throw. So if you’re looking for something hot, head to the blue door behind the shack, knock the tune of “It’s a Wonderful World” by Louis Armstrong and the password is “’Nawlin’s”. Be Safe!

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Once the activity from the Feds died down at the Shack, Alice and Jasper joined us at the safe house with a tour bus and a lot more luggage than only two people needed. So I thought I’d ask, “Hey, Alice what’s up with all the bags?”

“It’s so close to Mardi Gras, I thought we’d head on to New Orleans instead of going back to the Shack.”

“We’re going to Mardi Gras?” I asked

“Yep, and we’ll be there a few days early, so I thought we’d do some fun stuff while we’re there.” Alice responded and proceeded to outline our trip.

Once we’d arrived in the city, Alice had a bunch of crazy activities planned. One afternoon she thought it would be fun to visit a fortune teller. Everybody took turns getting their palms read, and after it we were finish we laughed that she predicted Edward would become a millionaire, Rosalie would have 3 children, and Alice would die at an early age.

Another afternoon, Alice scheduled us a private little Sookie Stackhouse tour, which was very fun because Rosalie and Emmett pretended to be Sookie and Bill the whole time. I suspect Emmett had a little too much fun with that one.

We visited museums, plantations, and cemeteries, even went shopping but the funniest was the afternoon we walked into a voodoo shop and the poor woman running it nearly had a heart attack. She ran up to me, grabbed my arm, and thrust a silver cross in the direction of the vampires that had walked in with me. “Stay back! I know what you are!” she shouted at them. “And I’m not going to let you harm this girl!”

“Harm me?” I asked snickering, “I think you’re more likely to hurt me than any of them are. Will you please let me go?”

At first they were all shocked and then I saw mischief flash in Jasper’s eyes and he winked at me, which made me wonder what they were thinking. He slowly sauntered towards me and the woman and stated very clearly in his very best Texan drawl, “Andi, you’ve always been a little naïve, but now this woman has exposed us. I guess it’s time to eliminate you and this woman. We always knew this day would come.” When he finally reached my arm, the woman abandoned me and ran screaming out the back of the shop. Jasper offered his arm and I looped mine through his.

“Eliminate?” I laughed. “Well, make it quick if you must then.” And we all walked out of the shop and headed back to the hotel laughing the whole way.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

While Mardi Gras may not be until March 8th, hanging out in the Big Easy inspired me to dig around extra hard and find some ‘Nawlin’s deals to bring you with me. I know you’ll adore the gems I found.

First, I have an amazingly addictive historical tale titled “Enchanté” by rpgirl27. The year is 1858 and after being forcibly kicked out of the city of Chicago, Edward and his father decide to sell their lucrative shipping business and relocate. However, it isn’t until Edward, a very skilled poker player, manages to win a plantation during a well played hand, that they decide New Orleans is where they will begin their new life. While adjusting to southern living, they are both introduced to a whole host of unfamiliar customs, including one in which gentlemen are able to take on a consort of African descent. Is a consort the motivation he needs to leave behind his sordid and sinful ways and become a true gentleman or will his father tempt him back into his not so noble life of drugs, whisky, and loose women? The characters in this story are a quite colorful cast and the author makes you feel every emotion and goose bump as the tension between Edward and Bella increases. I have adored every second of this antebellum piece and I know you will too.
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5676810/

Next, I have a hidden little gem called “Swan Song” by nothyme. Bella lives an unremarkable life, doing an unremarkable job, but that’s all about to change and it’s not even 10am yet, because a bar just opened down the street. You may wonder what could possibly be so special about a bar, but it’s not the bar itself that will change her; it’s the proprietor that will discover her, the family that will love her, the patrons that will encourage her, and a man that will heal her when she didn’t even realize how broken she was. And in return she will give them all she has left to give, herself. I love this story and it shocked me to no end that it remains to be largely undiscovered, but I guess life does occasionally imitate art, huh?
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5728734/

My last little melodic tale is titled “Keeping the Faith” by Holly1980. It’s so difficult to watch what you love fall to pieces, but you can’t avoid the truth forever. When Katrina hit New Orleans it scattered nearly all of its residents to locations all over the U.S. Once the waters receded they slowly began to trickle back but the state of their fair city was heartbreaking. Edward had always loved her; quite possibly the only love he’s ever known, but he just couldn’t bring himself to see her in all her devastation. However, he’s about to meet a woman who embodies the very city he loves. Will her love be enough to bring home the beloved wayward son and make him reclaim who he really is?
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5960568/

Now, to go along with these fics, I'm adding two recipes that were generously provided my darling blog sister Denise, or as some many know her, LaughingTwiGirl. Since she lives down there and will be partying like a crazy person, I trust she knows how to fix the local fare.

Gumbo was mentioned a couple times in these and since this Chicken Gumbo looks really good, I suggest you make a pot:

Chicken Gumbo
1 whole chicken cut up (skin removed)

3 to 5 quarts of water or chicken stock

1/2 cup chopped onions

1/2 tablespoon of celery

3/4 cup parsley

2 teaspoons bell pepper

1 teaspoon minced garlic

1 teaspoon of Worcestershire sauce (down here we allllll use Lea and Perrins)

salt and pepper to taste

a few bay leaves

Roux: 1/2 cup cooking oil and 1/4 cup all purpose flour

To make a roux requires time and patience, it can burn really really easily, I know, I've done it before! But in order to have the perfect Gumbo, you have to start with a Roux. Heat a stock pot over medium to low heat. Add oil, after a few minutes, finger a little flour in it to see if it starts to bubble, if so, add your flour slowly all the while WITH A WOODEN SPOON (don't use a plastic one) stirring. Your hand and arm will get tired as you stir constantly. Don't ever stop! The color of the roux is up to you but you want to achieve a color of a Hersey Kiss like my mom says. Once you have, turn your fire off immediately and let it cool for about 10 minutes, STILL STIRRING!
Now, put the pot back on heat, medium to low, add your vegetables. Stirring to soften, about 8 to 10 minutes. Slowing add your water or chicken stock, stirring. Then add the salt, pepper, red pepper, bay leaves, and sauce. Bring to a low rolling boil. Add your chicken. Keep the pot at a slow slimmer as the chicken cooks. While this is simmering, start a pot of rice and about 3 to 4 hours your Gumbo is ready!

What would Mardi Gras be without a drink and since one of my little dealings was all about Katrina, I think a Hurricane is just what we're looking for!

Ingredients

1 ounce lemon juice

4 ounces of dark rum

4 ounces of red passion fruit cocktail mix

crushed ice

orange and cherry for garnish

Mixing Instructions
Pour lemon juice, rum and cocktail mix into a cocktail shaker. Shake vigorously 1-2 minutes. Pack crushed ice into a 10 ounce highball glass. Pour drink mixture over crushed ice. Garnish with orange and cherry.

So, I'm chillin' until next week. If you're part of my challenge, be sure to log the chapters you've reviewed for the Million Word Reading Challenge (I've been challenged to write a Carlisle Fic and I'm thinking I'm about half way through, we'll see.), Tweet (FanFicDealer), Message me on Facebook, or email (fanficdealer@gmail.com) if you want to talk shop.

The deal has been made. ;)

Los Angeles Convention Information ~Summer

2011-02-25T12:13:00.001-05:00

TWILIGHT SAGA OFFICIAL CONVENTION TOUR
RETURNS TO LOS ANGELES
The Official Twilight Saga Convention Tour is coming back to LA for our annual visit on March 4-6, 2011 and we're rolling out the red carpet for you to make the scene and be with us for non-stop entertainment highlighted by the on-stage appearances of SEVEN Twilight celebrities as follows:

PETER FACINELLI: Dr. Carlisle Cullen
GIL BIRMINGHAM: Billy Black
BRONSON PELLETIER: The Wolf Pack's Jared
TINSEL KOREY: Emily
JULIA JONES: Leah Clearwater
BOOBOO STEWART: Seth Clearwater
and
JODELLE FERLAND: Bree Tanner

Also on tap for the weekend are events including The Friday Night Karaoke Concert hosted by Tinsel and Julia, The Volturi Vampire Ball with six guests on hand, The Sunday Morning Celebrity Brunch and Charity Auction, exclusive fan panels from Twilight Lexicon and TwilightMOMS, The Costume and Trivia Competitions, Auctions, Music, Videos and much more! Your hosts for the weekend are the delightful and talented Hillywood Show Cast!

Click on through to www.twilightconvention.com for complete details!

::Team Twilight:: Fan Fiction Friday

2011-02-25T05:00:00.000-05:00

I might have something you want. I might have something you need. It might be something legal or it might be something criminal. But the one thing I can tell you for sure is that the feds can’t have it and Lab Tech Andi will work hard to keep plenty on hand for you. Walk carefully to the blue door at the back of the shack; make sure you’re not being tailed by the law, knock the tune from Fall Out Boy called “This Ain’t a Scene, It’s an Arms Race” and give the password “FBI”

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

I looked up from my desk and glanced around the room. The lights in the lab were dim and the screens from the laptops the authors were using glowed around the room like tiny beacons of life. I could clearly see four bright rectangles shine back at me.

Thinking that a little soft music might be nice, I walked to the sound system and scrolled to a playlist that Edward and Renesmee had setup for me and pushed play. Behind me I heard a squeak and when I turned around I saw only three screens.

Figuring one of them simply got up to take a break; I walked back to my desk, picked up some files and turned toward the file cabinets. As I opened the drawer, I heard a muffled squeak behind me and when I turned around I saw only two screens.

Hmmm… I thought

“Hey guys?” I asked “Do you know where the other two went?”

“Nope,” I heard one of them answer.

“I didn’t see,” I heard from the other.

“Ok, I’m going to go check the bathroom. Can you guys stay here?” I said walking over to the bathroom. I opened the door and peered inside, “Anyone in here?” I asked into the obviously empty bathroom. I turned out the light and walked back into the lab only to find it as equally empty.

“Hey! I thought I said to stay here,” I yelled at no one. “Where is everyone?” Then the door flew open and Alice, Jasper, Emmett, and Edward came flying through the door.

“Andi! We need to get you out of here!” Alice said rushing over to me.

“Why? What’s going on?” I asked her slightly panicked now. “Did the Volturi find out about the Shack? Did other vampires get my authors?!?!”

“NO! No! No. Andi, calm down. It’s nothing that dangerous, but we do need to get you out of here now.” Alice said.

“Then tell me what’s going on! And where are my authors?”

“The authors are fine.” She explained. “Carlisle, Esme, Bella, and Rosalie have them and they are taking them somewhere safe. You’re going to go with Emmett and he’ll take you to where they are. It’s too dangerous to drive out of here, so you’ll have to ride on Emmett’s back. It’s not the Volturi who are coming, it’s the FBI.”

“Umm… We’re doing all this running from the FBI? Seriously? What do we have to hide?” I questioned as Alice began to push me toward Emmett and I started to giggle.

“Andi, we don’t have time for this! Somebody thought your twitter name was code for dealing something illegal and they called the feds. I saw that if they see the lab the way it’s setup they’ll hold you and we can’t have that. So you need to GO, NOW!”

“Come on,” Emmett held out his hand and then turned around so I could hop on his back. “Hold on tight, I wouldn’t want you to fall.”

With my arms tight around his neck and my legs wrapped around his waist, he dashed out the door. As we ran, I was curious, so I thought I’d ask, “So what are they going to do to the lab?”

“They’re going to hide the lab stuff and Alice and Jasper are going to pretend to live there. Charlie tried to stop the investigation, but they didn’t believe him.” Emmett responded without even sounding winded. He only carried me for a few more minutes before I heard the helicopters in the distance and I clung to him just a little tighter.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

While, I hid from the feds, I wondered about what they could possibly think we were dealing out in the middle of the woods. So all my dealing this week are files of the FBI kind.

My first criminal case file was found under the title “Here We Go Again” by butterflybetty. Bella Swan has never had an easy life. As a genius with a photographic memory, she managed to graduate high school at the age of 14 and got a masters degree from NYU in criminal justice and criminal psychology at merely 18. She started her career as an officer in the special victims unit at 19, but after seven years on the force and a very traumatic personal case she’s looking for a new start. So, she’s starting a new job with the FBI in Seattle and she thinks that the worst thing about starting over is that having to prove to the boys that she belongs. However, there is something evil lurking in her past that she thought was finally behind her but is in fact more tied to her than she could have ever imagined. This case has so many twists and turns that you’ll have a hard time putting this story down, because you’ll be dying to figure out what will happen next.
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5690614

My next criminal case file came under the name “Losing Faith” by Twilifed113. Bella Cullen thinks that her husband is a traveling medical supplies salesman, but he spends so much time away, her best friend thinks he might be having an affair. Suddenly, she’s not so sure about her marriage, but upon his return from his latest trip tells her things will change. However, when Edward’s past puts her life in danger the only way to save her will require him revealing the truth about his job. He works for the FBI and has done so since his parents were murdered when he was 18. Now they are on the run, just trying to survive, but Bella doesn’t feel like she knows anything about her husband anymore and Edward’s going to have to use this time to convince her otherwise. At least until the trial that will make them both safe again.
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/6371061

This next smut-filled criminal case, I just couldn’t resist, because I adored the title, “Empty Lab Adventures” by dqwhit19. This is a crossover so subtle that even if you’ve never seem a single episode of Bones, you’ll never notice. Dr. Bella Swan is a famous and uber intelligent forensic anthropologist who honestly finds the dead more fascinating than the living; well maybe not all of the living. Edward Cullen is her FBI agent partner who has secretly lusted after her for ages. So, when Bella’s the only one working in the lab while everyone else is at a conference, will Edward finally act on all his secret desires? Maybe he’s not the only one with fantasies.
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/4834979

My last criminal case stood out like a beacon because it was all “Scarlet” by archer24. The Scarlet Thief, known only by the scarlet calling card they leave behind, is the most incredible thief the world has never seen and has managed to elude the feds for years. Every agent who’s worked this case until now has been left bewildered as to how he managed to avoid capture. But, FBI agent, Edward Cullen, who has been able to catch every criminal he’s come across, just found out something that no one else has; that The Scarlet Thief not a man, but in reality a very sexy and confident woman. Will she be able to continue to avoid the FBI? Perhaps art and jewels aren’t the only things she’s capable of stealing.

http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5432277

So in the spirit of our escape, I recommend you simply "Run Like Hell"

Ingredients
1 shot Jack Daniel's
1 shot Southern Comfort
1 shot Cola
1 shot Lemonade

Mixing Instructions
Chill Jack and SoCo separately. Pour a shot of each ingredient. Take each shot in this order: Jack, Lemonade, SoCo, Cola.

Assuming I don't get put in the slammer, I'll see you next week. If you're part of my challenge, be sure to log the chapters you've reviewed for the Million Word Reading Challenge (We've already had one person hit a million, how many more can I get?), Tweet (FanFicDealer), Message me on Facebook, or email (fanficdealer@gmail.com) if you want to talk shop.

The deal has been made. ;)

::Team Twilight:: Fan Fiction Friday

2011-02-18T05:00:00.000-05:00

Hey, guess what! I have a secret and I’m not gonna tell you. Oh! So, you want to know my secret? Just how bad do you want to know? Ok, maybe I’ll give you a hint, there’s music and dancing. If you want to know more, you’ll have to find the blue door behind the love shack, knock the tune of “Celebration” by Kool and the Gang and give the password “Ashley”. Be Safe!

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

The soft rhythmic click, click, click of the keys melded harmoniously with the melodic music that flowed through the lab lulling my overactive mind. The Cullen’s were all still away on their romantic getaways so the authors were busy bringing them alive in their words. In fact, there were so many stories sitting on my desk, I wasn’t sure what direction to go.

My eyes grew heavy with the hypnotic tune coupled with the words that were streaming before me sending my thoughts into another plane of consciousness. I could feel my head drift forward, but before my head could hit the desk, my phone rang.

Jerked awake, I grabbed my phone to see Alice’s picture flash on my screen. “Hey, Alice! How’s Italy?” I asked trying to shake the exhaustion from my voice.

“Oh my, you would not believe the designers I’ve seen! The Bottega Veneta handbags I found are just to die for!” She answered excitedly.

“That’s great!” I said stretching, trying to wake myself up. “So, what’s up?”

“Andi, have you looked at your calendar? I know you’ve been having a hard time deciding what stories to pick out for this week, but I know if you look at your calendar that fog will clear up.”

“Ok, did you put something on my calendar?” I said, giggling into the phone and pulled up my planner.

“No, silly! You did, you’ve just forgotten and I’m simply here to remind you.”

I scan my eyes over the little squares for each day, trying to find the hint I apparently left myself and then I see it, blazing in bright red, “Oh my God! It’s Ashley Greene’s birthday on Monday, how could I have forgotten!”

“Exactly, so I’m going to get back to shopping and you can thank me later. Maybe I’ll send her one of these amazing handbags.” Alice said right before I heard the line disconnect.

Quickly, I grabbed the remote for the stereo and turned on some dance music. “Ok ladies, in the spirit of Alice, I’m declaring it party time.” And the authors and I danced away while I hunted down stories befitting our favorite party girl on her birthday.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

To honor the birthday of Ms. Ashley Greene, all the tales I’m offering up this week feature out favorite future telling vampire, Alice. I hope you enjoy them.

My first tale holds a plot twist on the original story, appropriately titled “Redemption” by Lillie Cullen. James and Alice share a past that she might not be able to remember, but James hasn’t been able to forget. Even when he was turned and his human memories should have faded, only his memories of Alice have remained. All he ever wanted to do was protect her, but he failed and when she opened her new eyes, she ran from him screaming. So, just what does their past hold? Will he ever be able to mend his evil ways and find redemption? This is actually a very beautifully written story that you won’t regret reading and a James you might even fall for.
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/4780450

My next tale is an insanely hot collaboration titled “One More Shot” by calin-durus and kirmit. It may have been all the shots that convinced her to go home with him. It might be the more than the fact that he doesn’t know her name and still he can’t get her out of his mind. Never in their lives has a one night stand ever been this unforgettable, but for Alice and Jasper this is was more than just a one night stand. There is something drawing them together and what they thought was the first time may not really be true. This story is hot in all the right places and who in their right minds can avoid Jasper as a musician. That in itself is worth a read.
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/4900904
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/4900903

My last tale is a continuation of sorts called “Tropic of Gemini” by In.a.blue.bathrobe. Ever wonder what happened to the band, “Breaking Dawn” on their European tour? Well, there’s more to this story and even though Alice is really growing as a performer in the band and not just a manager, there are other temptations threatening to pull them apart. Will old demons surface and attempt to exact their revenge? Will they be able to resist?
http://m.fanfiction.net/s/5512292

Because this is a party, I think we should have something fun like a “Lemon Celebration”

Ingredients
3 oz. Champagne
1 oz. Liqueur, raspberry
1 oz. Rum, lemon

Mixing Instructions
Shake ingredients in a cocktail shaker with ice. Strain into a cocktail glass.

Until next week, when my Cullen’s will come back to me. If you're part of my challenge, be sure to log the chapters you've reviewed for the Million Word Reading Challenge, Tweet (FanFicDealer), Message me on Facebook, or email (fanficdealer@gmail.com) if you want to talk shop.

The deal has been made. ;)

::Team Cullen:: Happy Cullentine's Day 2011 from Dr. Cullen's Love Shack

2011-02-13T14:34:00.002-05:00

Make video montages at www.OneTrueMedia.com

::Team Twilight:: Fan Fiction Friday

2011-02-11T05:00:00.000-05:00

Go tell your husband, boyfriend, or significant other that you’ve found somebody new. Lab Tech Andi is kidnapping you for Valentine’s Day and holding your captive with these exotic little fics that promise something just slightly out of the ordinary. So, when you find yourself standing in front of a blue door without knowing how or when you got there, knock the lively beat of “I Do” by Colbie Caillat and the password is “Mon Coeur”. Be Safe!

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

“Wow! What a game!” I said to Esme as I carried an arm full of dishes to the dishwasher. “That was incredible! It’s too bad that no one actually scored though.” She took the dishes from me and loaded them into the machine.

It was the day of the big football game, the Quileute pack versus the Cullen Clan. The afternoon was blocked out for our game and then later Charlie, Billy, and a few other human friends were coming to the Cullen’s house to watch the Super Bowl on the their ridiculously huge flat screen. So everyone had gathered in the clearing, and thankfully Renesmee was sitting beside me filling me in on the details. They were all moving so fast, it was hard for my human eyes to take it all in. They’d been tossing that football around for four hours and just when the Cullen’s were about to claim the first touchdown, Paul phased, catching the ball with his teeth and popping it as he bit down, ending the game.

“If I could have seen that he’d do that, I would have brought extra balls.” Alice chimed in as she also carried in a load of dirty dishes, a slight frown on her face.

“Well, that’s something to note for next time.” I smiled as I walked passed her and back out into the dining room where Bella was dashing around the room picking up paper plates and cups. “With Valentine’s Day coming on a Monday this year, what sort of plans does everybody have?” I inquired out of curiosity.

“Edward and I are taking Nessie and Jake down to the Amazons.” Bella answered tying up the bag she had. “Zafrina’s been bugging us forever to bring Nessie, so we thought it would be good and Edward and I can get in some alone time while she occupied.” Bella wore a smug little smile and I was just sure she had other plans, but I didn’t even want to ask.

“Jasper’s taking me to Italy to visit some of those designer stores we saw the last time we were there.” Alice declared dancing around the room moving furniture back into place as she passed. “I’ve been dying to go back ever since, but it wasn’t until now, it seemed safe to venture there.”

“Where are you and Carlisle going, Esme?” I asked turning my head back toward the kitchen. I heard her start up the dishwasher and walked at human speed to join us.

“Isle Esme, of course!” and we all giggled.

“Well, I bet Emmett got some big romantic plans up his sleeves.” I stated to no one in particular.

“Actually,” Rosalie announced from the doorway, “Emmett and I are headed to Chicago for the Chicago Car Show.”

“Really?” I ask a little surprised. “How’d he talk you into that one?”

“It was my idea,” she shrugged. “I’d much rather look at all those beautiful machines then clothes any day.” She responded and Alice stuck out her tongue at Rose.

As Bella tied up another bag of trash, she said, “You know, it’s good that we all have somebody, but I still feel sort of sad for Leah.”

“Okay, that was random,” I said back.

“No, let me explain.” Then she sat in one of the chairs before she spoke again. “While we were playing today, I noticed how hard she attacked Sam. I was like she was looking to get even. Maybe, she would feel better balanced if she had someone in her life.”

“Hmm… I think you’re onto something there.” I nodded. “So, if you were going to try to find anyone a mate, who are the people you think need them the most?”

“Oh, Jane for sure!” Alice added, “Although if her mate was as equally dangerous and evil they might take down the Volturi. Aro would not be happy with that outcome.”

I laughed, “Ok, who else?”

“I think Mike,” Bella said, thoughtful.

“Mike Newton?” I questioned. “Well, he’s human and we could just put him up on Match.com, but isn’t he still dating Jessica?”

“I don’t think so.” Esme said. “They broke up when they both went away to college.” I cocked my head a little and looked at Esme; she shrugged. “What? I hear things. This is a very small town.”

I shook my head. “You know, most of the time, the stories I deal out on Friday are all about you guys. What if give this Friday to non-Cullen centric stories?”

“That’s a great idea!” Alice exclaimed with everyone else nodding their agreement.

“Okay, then I’m off to the lab to see what I can dig up, unless you need me for anything?” I asked standing.

“Andi, we’ve got this covered. You’re too slow to be useful anyway; go do your thing,” Rose said as she pushed me towards the door.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

So, that was that, and just for Valentine’s Day we’re giving the Cullen’s a little bit of a break while we meddle in the lives of other characters. I hope you, enjoy!

My first valentine goes out to Jane in a little known tale called “Broken Dolls” by hopeforastalemate. After the Volturi return to Italy, Jane, who has always had her brother at her side, manages to find herself alone for the first time in her very long life when Alec gets mated. Without her brother around, Jane is temperamental and hard to get along with, burning anyone who looks at her the wrong way. Finally, Aro’s had enough and makes the suggestion that Jane start looking for a mate of her own, even if she has to go human to find one. But things get complicated when the person she chooses actually has some ties to the Volturi and has an even stronger personality than Jane. Who would have ever guessed that? This is a very sweet story and amazingly makes the Volturi a much softer and likable cast of characters, instead of the villains they’re usually made out to be. Don’t be surprised when you find yourself pulling for the vamps you’re so used to hating.
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5938172

My next valentine is for Leah, inside this amazing creative titled “Rising Star” by HopeReborn. Things have settled down since the standoff in the cleaning and everybody’s moved on. Charlie’s officially in a relationship with Sue; Leah’s going to school and studying to be a nurse at the hospital with Carlisle; Seth spends his time with Bella and Alice getting tutored in math. Life has returned to normal that is until someone new, with an incredible number of powers, moves to Forks turning everyone’s lives upside down and unknowingly bring something potentially more dangerous with him. Will joining all the supernatural powers existing in Forks be powerful enough to fight this evil? And just what do the Quileute legends have to do with all this? This is one tale that will have you on the edge of your seat just waiting to find out what’s going to happen next. As a bonus, this little tale has an equally hot lemony outtake called “Clash of Worlds” and because it’s the valentine season, this is one you certainly don’t want to miss.
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5772429

http://www.fanfiction.net/s/6693043

The last valentine I found is for Mike and Tanya in a fun and adventurous tale called “Life and Death with the Original Succubus” by April Rane. Between the Cullen’s and the Denali’s, everyone has found their perfect match, for heaven sakes even Nessie has a mate, except Tanya. She’s alone and spending time with so many couples is annoying. All she wants is some peace and quiet, so when Bella and Edward offer to take her with them to Forks with an opportunity to escape everyone else’s intimate relations, she jumps at the chance. For reasons that are unexplained, she finds herself attracted to the one person who annoys Edward worse than Jacob ever did. Mike Newton, on the other hand, is involved in a passionless relationship, engaged to Jessica Stanley, but ever since Tanya walked into his parents sporting goods store he craves something more exciting. Will this be exactly what the other has been looking for? You’ll have to pick up this little fic just to see how the Cullen’s take the news about Mike.

http://www.fanfiction.net/s/6177843

So just for the occasion, I’ve concocted another delightful cocktail that I’ve dubbed a “Cullentine”
Ingredients
2oz Apple liqueur
1oz Vodka
3oz Cranberry Juice
Ice Cubes

Mixing instructions
Shake ingredients with ice then strain into a wine glass.

Here's hoping everyone has a Sparkly Valentine's Day! If you're part of my challenge, be sure to log the chapters you've reviewed for the Million Word Reading Challenge, Tweet (FanFicDealer), Message me on Facebook, or email (fanficdealer@gmail.com) if you want to talk shop.

The deal has been made. ;)